The Anti-Hero
by BaileeBlair20
Summary: Not all heros are the obvious ones. And not all Dauntless agree with the orders given to them. Eric, with an immense thirst to prove himself to more that on person, is going to have to redefine what being Dauntless to him means. Eric/Tris pairing, with a Four/Tris complex, but entirely told for Eric's POV
1. Chapter 1

I never gave much thought to a change of rules. Things changed all the time here in dauntless. So in those two weeks before the annual choosing ceremony, when all the Dauntless leaders were called to a meeting with Erudite, I didn't think much of it. Dauntless breeds on obedience and with such a strong pact with Erudite there were no questions asked. Jeanine talked of all these plans she had that we would be implementing throughout the two week training of the initiates. As a well reputed leader I had full intentions of showing these new initiates what Dauntless were all about.

One new rule that did surprise me was that now people were going to start being cut from Dauntless. That was strange; no one in my training class was cut. It seemed like a very cut throat ideal, but then again it'll sort out the true dauntless and the wannabes. Whatever Jeanine had planned, I was sure that it was in the right mind. That was how I always remembered it…

Jeanine also talked about how she had changed the stimulation serum. I couldn't really follow all the technical and biological bullshit she went on and on about. Supposedly it was to make it easier to catch divergents. Good, I thought to myself. No use for them in our world anyways. I was impressed my Jeanine's scientist for improving the serum. Maybe if I could catch the most divergents within this new training group I could move up in Dauntless to a higher position.

All these ideas of promotions and recognition swam through my mind as I leaned against the ledge on top of the deserted building. The train would be here any second now with all the new initiates. Four and I were making bets this morning on what faction transfers would end up getting cut. I wouldn't be able to tell until I saw them. Still together we played out these ridiculous scenarios of new ways to train them to push them ever harder, it was all in twisted fun.

Soon enough the rambling metal came as the train whizzed by. Like popcorn all the new people jumped off the train landing harshly onto the top of the graveled building. The dauntless born landed cat like on their feet, they were naturals. I easily recognized all of them, I wasn't worried about them in the slightest.

Let's see, a few Candor, a Couple Erudite, no Amity (that was no surprise), and what…a abnegation? What was she doing here? Just like abnegation would, she blended in blandly with her surroundings in her ugly, gray tattered gown. She looked like the biggest stiff as I've ever seen. She didn't have a prayer.

"Alright listen up," I called out over them as the dauntless born gathered before me once I climbed onto the ledge. Shakily the transfers pulled themselves up and gathered towards me, "I'm Eric. I'm one of your leaders, if you want to enter Dauntless, this is the way in."

The transfers looked around curiously, as if they didn't believe me. I smirked at their cowardice, "And if you don't have the guts to jump, then you don't belong in Dauntless."

"Is there water at the bottom or something?" a kid from Candor asked.

"I guess you'll find out," I said glancing around noticing the nervous look on the stiff's face, "or not."

A murmur went through the small crowd of initiates. This was going to be difficult, silently I began wondering if cutting people was going to work out at all. So far from what I could tell there wouldn't be anyone left to join Dauntless.

"Someone's gotta go first," I said impatiently, "who's if going to be?"

A small quiet voice in the back called out, "me."

I stared in disbelief bit didn't show it on my face as the stiff called out saying she'd go first. Still, in giving her the benefit of the doubt I hopped off the ledge and let her climb up. She was slow at it, holding on defensively with her hands and was wobbling in the wind. When she had finally gained her balance, she glanced at me. I indicated for her to go, she stood looking over the ledge and began pulling off her thick ugly jacket letting it call to the floor.

"Yea stiff take it off," the same Candor called out, "put it back on."

 _Asshole_ , I thought to myself as some in the crowd chuckled. _There was no way this girl had any sort of a woman's body under all those tattered clothes_ , a dark part of my mind thought to myself as I glanced at her up and down.

"Today initiate," I said irritated in waiting for her.

To my surprise she jumped and let herself fall…and she didn't even scream.

Luckily, I only had to see the initiates in. Four, the unlucky bastard was the one taking them on a tour of their new home. I had to report back to Max, the real leader of Dauntless. I still had some paperwork bullshit to fill out before training started bright and early tomorrow morning. I made my way through the iron pathways to the reserved section for leaders only. A smug part of me took pride that I was allowed in this past few months and Four wasn't. He still had some groveling and ladder climbing before he could get to where I was.

"Hey Max," I called outside his office rapping on the door lightly, "it's me."

"Come on in," his deep voice called as I entered.

"More paperwork?" I asked sternly folding my hands behind my back.

"Yes sir," Max said looking flustered. My paperwork was nothing compared to his, all forms and shit from Jeanine. He had many things spread across his desk and handed me a manila folder.

"Sit down son," he invited me while handing me a pen, "you can go ahead a finish them up here. I gotta send them all back soon anyways."

"Thank you sir," I replied graciously taking the pen and opened up the folder.

"How do the new initiates look?" He asked not even looking at me as he scrawled through his papers.

"Pathetic," I said bluntly and he and I shared the same chuckle.

"Well I'm sure you can fix that easy enough," Max nodded confidently.

"Thank you," I repeated mechanically.

"Not that you need much help really," Max went on to say, "You've got an impressive record for training some of the best initiates in the last few years."

I smirked again.

"But this year I need you to step it up," Max began to press putting down his pen and watching me intently, "Jeanine has got my balls in an iron vice about cracking down on these initiates."

I didn't question why even though I wanted to, I knew better, "If there's a weak link in any of them I'll find it."

"Good, I need a good strong team," Max said with a similar smirk, "Erudite wants to strengthen the relationship between our two factions but we all gotta start with the initiates."

"I won't let you down," I promised his sternly.

"I have no doubt about you," he replied getting up and sat in the edge of his desk in front of me, "I know how ambitious you are here. I read over your application for that elite team that Jeanine is trying to put together, it's very impressive. I don't know what she had planned for them, but now she's asking for a reference from me about each of the Dauntless members who applied."

Would it be too much to ask for a good polished reference from Max? No, I couldn't. Max was an honorable man and so would I, if he felt I deserved it I would take it with pride.

"I prepared to give a good reference for you," Max said confidently, "you're young, brave, strong, ambitious and you understand the core of Dauntless values."

"It's an honor sir," I replied happily, "really, thank you."

"You show me what you can do with these new initiates. You know the new rules, you know where we're looking for," Max said now placing on his big hands on my shoulders, "do me proud son."

"Yes sir," I promised to him and to myself.

"Good," Max said nodding, "now let's get to dinner, I hungry as hell."

I nodded and followed behind him, all the new initiates would be joining us for dinner now. Max typically said something to them, sort of encouraging words to make them feel all nice. But the real work, my work, started tomorrow. Up the highest ledge, up above everyone I stood proud and tall. Very few people ever got to sit up here with Max and some of the higher up leaders. I worked my ass off to get up here. Down on the floor I could see Four…sitting with the pathetic new initiates, talking with them? Funny, I never thought Four would allow himself to talk to them with how smug her can be like me.

"Initiates," Max bellowed out, "stand."

The hall went mostly quiet, as the new members all stood.

"You have chosen to join the warrior faction tasked with the defense of this city and all its inhabitants," Max began boldly, "we believe in ordinary acts of bravery and the courage that rises on person to stand up for another. Respect that. Do us proud."

The typical applause rose from everyone, I rolled my eyes and the members of Dauntless raised the initiates making them crowd surf amongst themselves. I needed a burger and a beer.


	2. Chapter 2

I sent Four in with a wrench to go get the initiates. That'll be a nice awakening for them. I sat lazily on a boulder nearby waiting for them. Four was in a sort of "training" period himself to start paving his way to becoming a leader. I was really just shadowing him and helping out with the initiates. Once all of them were gather around us Four began explaining.

"There are two stages of training," Four began, "the first is physical, push your bodies to the breaking point and master the methods of combat. The second is mental, again breaking point; you'll face your worst fears and conquer them unless they get you first. You'll be trained separately from the dauntless born, but you'll be ranked together."

I glanced at the Dauntless born with pride, I know some of them. I watched them grow in the last five years that I was here from young teenagers to growing young adults. Some of the looked up to me, I even taught some of them how to fight in the days when I wasn't working and when they got back from school. The transfers on the other hand stood there looking nervous and unprepared.

"After initiations, rankings will determine what job you move into," Four continued, "leadership, guarding the fence, or keeping the factions from killing each other."

"Rankings will also determine who gets cut," I threw out.

A few in the transfer crowd seemed to notice me for the first time.

"Cut?" one girl asked with a disgusted tone, I recognized her. Candor.

"At the end of each stage of training the lowest ranking initiates will be leaving us," I explained as if it were common knowledge.

"To do what?" another face in the crowd asked.

"Well there's no going home to your families so you live factionless," I shrugged simply.

"Why didn't we know that?" another one asked.

"It's a new rule," I said keeping it simple just as last night's paper works instructed me to say when they asked questions.

"A new rule?" the same girl piped up like a typical big mouth Candor, "Somebody should have told us that!"

"Why? Would you have chosen differently?" I challenged all them speaking from the heart, "Or out of Fear? Well if that's the case, you might as well get out now. If you're really one of us it won't matter that you might fail. Now you chose us, now we get to choose you."

That was the same mentality they had drilled into me when I told them I wanted to be a leader hear. Leaders don't submit an application like you would to Jeanine. Leaders are chosen, and only by the best. When Max had told me once in my training days that I had the potential to become a leader I committed every waking moment to become one. It was the highest honor that a Dauntless could be offered. It disgusted me that Four had turned them down twice.

We sent the initiates into the gym, sending them to run laps and do some practice fights. I could already tell who was going to be in the top ranking. Edward and Peter stuck out to me. Except Peter was arrogant…worse than me even; that concerned me. Arrogance breeds fear… Four regularly took them up to the rooftops getting them acquainted with our weapons and more physical training exercises. After a week of training, I had to go out onto the floor to observe them and fill out a regular report to send to Max.

"Ready for some real fighting?" I asked walking up to Four as there were several initiates scattered around practicing drills.

"Not even close…" Four growled quietly watching on with a clenched jaw.

I noticed the Abnegation girl, Tris, doing drills with the Candor girl, Christina. Her face was red and sweaty and her long hair was falling loosely out of her pony tail. She jumped first, she might have some potential.

"First jumper!" I called out to her, she glanced at me I had her attention, "in the ring."

She stared at me with a stunned gaze, and headed over to a raised ring. The gym fell silent, some of the other initiates gathered around to watch.

"Last jumper!" I called out looking for the other girl, "time to fight…"

The two girls headed onto the mat, look anxious.

"How long do we fight for?" the other girl, Molly asked.

"Till one of you can't continue," I replied.

"Or one of you concedes," Four said to them.

"According to the old rules," I added onto.

I could tell Four became tense besides me, "New rules: no one concedes."

"You really wanna lose them on their first fight?" Four asked unsure.

"A brave man never surrenders," I said not bothering to look at him.

"Lucky for you those weren't the rules when we fought," Four mumbled between the two of us.

I clenched my jaw through a flash of rage. I felt like fucking punching Four so goddamn hard he'd ever forget about that damn fight. Only good thing that came out of that fight was a friendship with Max.

"You'll be scored on this so fight hard," I said quickly hoping to hide my inner rage all the while hoping that none of the initiates heard Four.

Molly raised her hands defensively; meanwhile Tris continued looking at me with a dumbfounded look.

"Go!" I prompted Tris impatiently.

The two girls rolled around pathetically, both unable to get a good grip on one another. Molly threw a few girlish punches, while Tris absorbed them fully. She wasn't even trying! She kept backing away and trying to dodge her hits. She had that same Abnegation look on her face of softness and innocence. Weakness is what it was here. I wanted to tell her to throw a punch but Molly got her down clean with hit her hard with one solid punch. She was out.

After the fight, Tris was sitting off to the side with an ice pack to her face. I called for them to follow me, "Alright guys over here!"

"Listen up," I demanded messing with the tech that Jeanine had provided for us. I lead them over to a board pressing a few buttons on the remote, "You know what this board is? It's your life. We grade you every day. If you're still in the red by the end of the first stage, you're out."

Tris was second to last. There would be no way she would catch up. Edward, Peter and a few others I knew would be in the top were.

"Alright guys," Four called out to them, "go rest up. You're done for the night."

I turned heading towards the leadership quarters. Four followed behind me, "Eric!"

I turned facing him, not bothering to hide my grimace, "if you ever tell them again about me I will make sure you work down in the fucking kitchens for the next five years."

"What's wrong? Worried that they'll all find out that you're human too?" Four asked catching up to me. He was trying to be nice.

I scowled at him, "you need to push them harder, enough of this pathetic fighting bullshit."

"I'm pushing them as hard as I think I should," Four started to say, "I just don't think tha-"

"No!" I said to him raising an eye brow, "you're going to push them like I tell you too! Stop fucking around and bite down on them."

"Why do we need to push them so hard?" Four demanded with a grimaced looked.

"Because I said so!" I enunciated and started walking again towards the leadership quarters.

"Alright fine!" Four said throwing up his hands and followed me, "I'll start pushing tomorrow but c'mon man it's Friday night. Let's go do something."

"I'm working," I lied worried that from the mix of alcohol and my clenched fist right now that the night wouldn't end well with Four and I hanging out.

"C'mon take a night off from all your paper work and Erudite bullshit," Four invited, "let's get drunk tonight."

That was one sentiment I could agree with.


	3. Chapter 3

I slammed the small glass onto the wooden counter in the middle of the moderately packed bar. The juke box was playing some loud of rock music, the air was thick and smoky from cigarettes. I finished my third whiskey on the rocks. I was getting pleasantly tipsy as I was getting light headed; my sore muscles from my own work outs were loosening up. In between my fingers was a cigarette that I was slowly puffing on, this week sucked. Seeing the way the new initiates were fighting only stressed me more. I had to submit a report tomorrow night about their first week; at this rate it wasn't going to be a good one. Despite the fact that we weren't Candor, I couldn't embellish it at all. Max would be reading it, he would know if I was lying. With a promotion and a chance to work with Jeanine was just on the horizon I was not about to blow it.

I needed another drink; better yet I needed a shot. As if the bar tender read my mind she came up to me. She arched her back to me with a hand on her hip. Her black tank top bowed low down her chest as she arched towards me. It'd be a lie to say that it wasn't helping to put my stressed mind at ease.

"Another whiskey on the rocks?" she purred to me with a deep red lip stick smile plastered one her face. I hated how much makeup she was wearing, it made her look like a hooker.

"Give me a shot of fireball," I requested glancing downward knowing that was her intention. At least that looked better than her face right now.

"Make it two," said Four coming up behind me sitting on the stool next to me. He must've finished up his game of pool with a few of the other leaders and came back over to me.

"Really dude?" I laughed feeling funny and took a drag from my cigarette. I had an unnatural habit of running my mouth when I was drunk, "why don't you start with something a little weaker? We all know how much of a light weight you are."

"Bet you I could keep up with you," Four said with a small grin.

A challenge, I was always up for one. However from the beginning I hardly ever trusted Four. My paranoia always kicked in around him. He knows how I would run my mouth when I was drunk. Just a few months ago he unwittingly got me to confess that I had cheated on my ex-girlfriend who just so conveniently happened to show up not to long after that. I always assumed that Four set it up that way and just broke up with her in the middle of this same bar that same night in hopes of wiping that smug look of his damn face.

"You can try man," I laughed it off as the bar tender placed two shots of the amber liquid in front of Four and I.

I took mine down, throwing my head back enjoying the burning on my throat. This single shot of fireball and this cigarette was like an oasis in the desert bringing a sweet relief to such a shitty week. Now I just had to shut Four up again. I just needed to bid my time as I asked for another whiskey, while Four ordered a beer.

"So who's on the bottom?" I asked trying not to slur.

"Eric, Tris, Elaine and Jimmy," Four said methodically sipping his beer.

"What the fuck is that Abnegation chick doing here?" I said with a laugh, the mere idea of it was amusing to me.

It seemed to amuse Four too because he chuckled, "no clue man…she reminds me of all the stiffs that we went to high school with."

"She reminds me of you," I jabbed at him remembering where he came from.

"I am not like her!" Four yelled perhaps a little too forcefully.

Good, I was getting a rise out of him. I needed to keep my cool around him.

"Cut from the same ugly gray cloth," I pointed out with a smirk.

"Yeah and if I remember correctly you couldn't quiet keep up with the Erudite standards for grades back in school huh?" Four jabbed.

"Hey I'd love for you to see all the shit on those Erudite tests you gotta know and tell me what you get," I spat back bitterly. I wasn't afraid to admit I wasn't smart enough for Erudite. Dauntless were better than them anyways.

"Fine so we're right where supposed to be right?" Four said raising his beer to me.

I clinked my small glass to his beer bottle, "amen brother."

I believed that in my heart now…the only down side to being drunk is that it would bring back everything that I wanted to forget like the time that I didn't believe that I was where I was supposed to be…

* * *

"Stop! Stop!" I couldn't take it anymore, "I concede… I can't."

I laid there huddled over in a heap of a mess, the mat was stained with more blood than usual. My blood, which was pouring out of my nose like a fountain at this point, covered my face dripping down my throat to my chest. My nose might be broken. My arms were so sore I couldn't even hold myself up. I had no fucking energy at all. I was just fucking done. I was so fucking frustrated with myself as hot tears escaped me eyes. Was this really better than all those tests and studying had to do back home? But it wasn't…this was home now.

"Alright," said Tom, my trainer at the time, "get up kid. Go clean your face."

I tried to get to my feet, my legs were sore too from all the running I've been doing. I only stumbled over myself and ended up falling off the stage. My peers laughed at me, adding insult to injury. I refused to cry even though I might. I was just so exhausted that I couldn't care. But I refused.

"Awesome job Four!" I heard Tom call out making me only run away even though I knew I couldn't, "I hope you were all watching that! That's exactly what you need to do here in order to make it."

I hobbled faster than usual over to a water basin.

"Need a hand son?" a strong voice came.

I looked up and bolted up immediately recognizing who it was. Max, he was a leader here; he was even campaigning right now to become the head of Dauntless.

"Hello sir," I said standing tall ignoring he screaming pain radiating everywhere really.

"Here," he said handing me a dark towel.

"Thank you," I muttered darkly feeling embarrassed by my state. My face was still damp from all the blood and mess that I was. I dipped it into the water bringing it up to my face. It was tedious work, seemed like no matter how long I stood there wiping my face it wouldn't stop bleeding it was all over my hands to.

"C'mon, why don't you go lie down in the dorm for a little while," Max invited.

"Oh I'm fine," I tried to assure him, show no weakness.

"Really son, you look like shit," he said bluntly, "go lay down for an hour and come back I'll tell your leaders that you're resting."

"Are you sure? I can keep going," I tried to convince the both of us.

"Do you really want to keep fighting?" Max asked unsure.

"Yes! I do!" I said feeling a fire ignite in me slowly. Seeing Max was bringing some motivation and strength back into my weakened limbs.

"Alright come with me," Max insisted, "Leave the towel here."

I did as he commanded, tossing the dirty towel into the basin. My hands were still soaked with fresh blood but I didn't care. I followed as Max and I strode through the halls towards the chasm near the initiates dorms. There was a single iron walk way with no guard rails on the side. Once we got to the middle, Max's strong hands pushed my chest over the guard rail.

I started to scream, feeling my heart fly to my throat as Max caught my arms, "grab the rail."

I hung there flabbergasted. Was he going to drop me and let me die? Was the fight to pathetic and now I was going to be killed for it? I hung there limp, hating the alien feeling of not having solid ground under my feet. The blood on my arms and hands were staining Max's now.

"Grab the rail," he repeated.

Focus, I told myself, he's testing me. I was not going to let him down. I needed to prove to him of all people that I can do this. Talk was cheap, something that my idiot parents and siblings never learned. Actions spoke louder. I grabbed onto the rail but with the blood on my hands, I kept slipping. Max let go of me.

"I've been watching you son," Max said leaning casually against the rail, "you're impressive…but you need more than that to make it here."

I growled frustrated as I kept slipping down to my fingertips. I just kept pulling myself back up and moved my hands away from the part where my blood stained the bars.

"You have the fire within you," Max continued, "you could be great you know. But you have to want it… you have to want it more than anything. More than that you have to know why you want it. Why did you suddenly decide to change your mind to go back and fight when you saw me?"

I growled again as the more I held onto with the tips of my fingers the more I could hear my heart pounding in my ear. My arms felt like lead.

"Why do you want to fight?" Max repeated more aggressively.

"To prove to you I can do it!" I growled readjusting my hands again.

"That's not good enough!" Max screamed.

I was surprised that he was yelling at me, so much so that I almost slipped completely off be grabbed back on just in time.

"Being dauntless, being a fighter means standing up for what you believe in! Doing it to impress another will get you right where you are right now!" Max went on to yell, "We are here to protect those who others won't, and we help one another. Standing up for what you believe in…even when you're not told to is true bravery."

He strode over to me and bent down getting close to my face, "now I could let you fall…but that'd only prove that you're not a dauntless."

"I am dauntless!" I screamed back frustrated.

"Then prove it!" Max demanded, "hang there and go back in and fight, or ask me to pull you up and you can have the rest of the day off."

* * *

His words made sense to me that day…they still did. However back then we didn't have Erudite making pacts with us and telling us how to run or system as much as they were now. Things were changing.


	4. Chapter 4

At the start of the new week things were looking better. Although through the weekend I worked through a massive hang over and wrote an honest report, sending one to Max, and one to Jeanine. I'm sure at some point I bitched at Four for cracking down on the initiates again but I can't really remember. I do remember everything else as far as what happened in the bar that night. I downed three more shots of fireball, won twenty bucks off another dauntless leader with my trick shot on the pool table and found Four puking outside into the chasm after his third shot of Fireball. Whatever secrets Four was trying to pull outta me, he wasn't getting.

Bright and early at the start of the new week, the initiates were all back in the gym running drills and practices. I prowled through them, giving them advice and showing them how to properly stand and throw punches. It was slow work, but even the worst were improving. Tris had been standing at that same orange punching bag for nearly an hour now. She was determined I give her that, but she was still small and weak.

"Hey Four," I called to him as he was talking to a group around him about defense stances, "go give the stiff over there some help."

He glanced at her and saw the same things I did, "okay."

He wandered over to her, watching her form as she pathetically punched away. I could over hear his explaining how to keep tension at her core and tell her to attack first. I suppose that was another advantage she had. She was small; but at least now without all those gray rags on she looked like she actually had a figure. She could be quick if she learned. I almost laughed when he put her hands on her waist, seeing how red she got on her face (and not from the physical activity), and how awkwardly she stood there in his arms. Once a stiff always a stiff.

Over on the mat, Christina and Molly were at it again. Molly was getting good, she had the making to be strong. Christina was losing miserable, Molly had too good of a hold on her and threw her to the ground. Once she was there Molly delivered a few more good punches and kicks. Christina began crawling away.

"Stop! Stop!" she coughed, covered in blood and sweat in a heap on the floor, "I'm done."

I quickly shoved memories of last night from my mind, "you need to stop?"

Breathing heavily, Christina sighed. She was beat, her short hair was damp with sweat, blood smeared around her nose. Molly stood over here with a big smile on her face, while she nodded at Peter and Edward victoriously.

"Ok," I said keeping my face contempt, time to teach everyone a lesson, "let me give you a hand."

Across from the mat, Tris had a puzzled look on her face. Staring at me in the eye, she was smart too…

I held out my hand to Christina, she looked equally puzzled but grateful for the help as she took my hand. I pulled Christina up as she muttered her gratitude with a smile. Time to wipe that smile off her face.

"Alright let's everyone take a break," I called out to the gym, making them all follow me.

We headed down the rocky hallway, I put my hand on Christina's waist, "you uh…feeling a little better?"

We stepped onto the iron walk way.

"Yeah," Christina muttered happily, "I'm fine."

With my hand on her waist I hastily shoved her off of it. Reflexively, she grabbed onto with one hand while I held her other, "grab the rail... or don't."

Everyone behind me gasped, Four paused with a serious look on his face. Darting from me to Christina who was whimpering.

"You got three options," I said leaning back on the one sided railing, "hang there and I'll forget your cowardice, fall and die or give up…but if you give up you're out."

I stood there watching her as the seconds ticked by, bidding my time. I caught Four's eye, he looked pissed.

"C'mon Chris," came a familiar small voice.

I looked over at Tris; her bright hazel eyes met mine. I was half tempted in that moment to throw her over too…but I didn't have a logical reason.

The rails were shaking…and she was slipping. At least her hands are dry, I thought to myself darkly.

I was growing bored; I waited a few more seconds before I called out, "time."

I didn't bother helping her, Tris and one other helped pull her back over. Just like I expected, Christina crumbled in Tris's and started crying.

"Dauntless never give up!" I declared loudly so everyone would hear me and left them heading towards my office. I had an hour to kill before a meeting with Max, Jeanine and a few members from both Factions' leaders. I had made it near my office when I heard Four behind me.

"Hey!" he called after me.

I didn't stop.

"Hey! Eric!" he called now running towards me.

I walked into my office and fell down onto my chair rubbing my temples. I think I was still hung over.

"What the hell are you doing?" Four demanded slamming the door behind him.

"Following orders," I yelled back, "you should try it sometime."

"By throwing off all the initiates into the chasm?" Four said exasperated, "where the hell is that written in your new Erudite training book?"

"Hey! Watch your fucking mouth!" I demanded standing up, "if you wanted to train them your way that you should fucking taken the leadership job when they offered it to you."

"So that's what this is about then?" Four replied.

"No this is all riding on the fact that I'm meeting with Max, Jeanine and everyone else on the board tonight to discuss the new training program and after that pathetic report I had to write last week because of your sorry ass I'm taking it a little more seriously than you," I explained to him.

"Why the hell is Erudite coming here?" Four asked quieter now, more concerned.

Shit… and I'm not even drunk.

"Sorry, need to know basis only," I replied with a sarcastic smile, "listen you're taking them out to the fence tomorrow. Tell them that this sorry ass training your giving them is about to get a lot harder. I'm going to train them to be the dauntless they need to be. You should know that."

Four puffed his chest and stalked out of my office. Prick… I had enough shit to worry about without having to worry about whether or not these damn initiates were going to cost me my spot on Jeanine's team. I need to impress her tonight, her and Max for that matter.

I headed up to my pent house taking a shower and putting on my best clothes to properly represent Dauntless. I could feel the nerves growing; it wasn't often that I saw the Erudite board. I wasn't even entirely sure as to why they were coming here tonight. There would only be one way to find out. As I was about ready to leave so I could show up early, there was a small knock on my door.

I stalked over wondering who I would be, and was thrown back by who it was, "What the fuck are you doing here?"

"Nice to see you too," said the man, dressed in a blue suit standing straight, he held out his hand to me.

I ignored it, leaving to door open, "What do you want Cole?"

"Can't I come say hi to my brother?" he said walking in examining the room around him.

"Funny, last time I saw you the first thing you said to me was faction before blood," I said pulling a stick of deodorant out of my dresser.

"Doesn't mean we can't be civil," Cole replied kicking away a dirty shirt on the floor, "I see you haven't changed."

"I could say the same about you," I replied throwing on my leather jacket.

"Yes well hopefully after tonight we can reform an alliance," Cole said optimistically.

Our parents always said all us boys' looked alike, same strong jawline and strong nose. Only difference was I was the only one out of all of us to inherit my moms' dark blue eyes. Cole pretty much was the spitting image of me, tall and ruggedly handsome. Only thing that set me apart from them was all the tattoos I put on my neck. I'm pretty sure I saw my mom at one point out on the streets who gave me a disapproving glare of all my tattoos.

"One can only hope," I said sarcastically.

"I saw that you submitted an application to be on Jeanine's team," Cole said contempt.

"Yup," I replied throwing some stuff into my pocket wishing he'd leave.

"Well I think you'll be great," he said with a smile.

My stomach flipped for a moment, "does that mean I've been picked?"

"No not yet, Jeanine hasn't made her selection yet," Cole replied.

I snorted and sat there in an awkwardly silence and after some times asked, "how's mom?"

"Mother's well," Cole nodded, "she told me to send you her regards."

"Super," I replied bitterly walking past him out the door. I waited until he stepped out and slammed the door behind him. There were three small flights of stairs down to the main floor. Cole began climbing down them while I threw myself over the rail, letting myself fall past him lading cat like on my feet.


	5. Chapter 5

Outside of the main room where we all met, a few Erudite I recognized to well and Dauntless leaders all gathered outside. We all stood outside, distracting ourselves with idle talk. Jeanine wasn't here yet.

"Eric," Max called walking up to me. He looked pleased, "How's training going?"

"I'm working on it," I nodded trying to remain cool.

"Have you been pushing them harder?" Max asked as a few other leaders above my rank gathered around me eager to hear my answer.

"I am," I replied folding my arms, "I don't think the problem is the initiates though."

"Well if there's something wrong with the leaders," Max said confidently, "I'm sure that you'll take care of it."

"I'm sure he will too," same a soft controlling face, "everyone looked over to the woman in the blue power suit and light blonde hair.

"Jeanine," Max smiled holing out his hand, "Welcome to dauntless."

"Thank you," she smiled calmly and headed for out meeting room, "shall we?"

"Yes, let's go," Max said opening the doors as everyone piled in. All us dauntless sat on one side of a long metal table while the Erudite crowded around the other with note pads and brief cases onto the table.

"So how are things in the lab going?" Max asked to the Erudite. I didn't know that they were working in the lab.

"Exceptional," said one of them who I knew as Craig, "the serum that we designed is working perfectly."

"What's the serum?" one of my superiors asked.

"It's a transmitter serum," another Erudite explained, "it makes the subject easier to subjection. We designed a program that controls it, we will be able to see and hear everything that the subject with the serum is but they conscience mind will not process it."

What was the point of all this?

"What do you want to do?" Max asked them openly.

"We want to eradicate a problem a certain faction;" Jeanine said plainly, "Abnegation are harboring divergents."

Seriously? How do they know?

"So what are we going to do about it?" Mark, a dauntless leader asked.

"We need to man power to find them," Cole said pulling out spread sheets, "we want to inject the dauntless with the serum so we can use to at our disposal."

"Disposal?" I asked concerned.

"It's just a figure of speech," Cole reassured, "we want to use your soldiers to eliminate the threat to our faction system. We will inject the serum and a tracking device. Both are harmless, it will just be an easier way to control them."

"We need your cooperation to solve the divergent problem," Jeanine said raising her eye brow.

"That's what we're here for," Max said happily.

"There is an added bonus to the serum," said Craig, "the serum won't work on divergents."

"That's a bonus?" I asked confused. This was just why I didn't stay.

"Well if there are any divergent amongst your initiates we will find out about it," Jeanine replied as if it were common sense.

"If there are any divergents in my initiate class I'll find them!" I said boldly.

Jeanine smiled at me, "I'm sure you will, I was quiet impressed with your application to be on my team Eric."

"Thank you," I replied bowing my head.

"We want to build a lab here," Jeanine went on to say.

"Here?" Max asked thrown off by her.

"Yes, we have already drawn up plans designing the lay out the equipment, supplies, we can have everything ready in a few weeks," Craig explained clearly.

"All we need is your approval," Jeanine said bringing out some documents and sliding them to Max.

"Alright, give me a day or two to look over these and I'll send them back your way," Max nodded looking over them.

"Eric," Jeanine said finally turning to me, "I want you on board with my team."

There it was…a job offer. Everything I wanted.

"But I also want to wait until you're done with your training program with the initiates," Jeanine said coolly, "I want you to find the outliers."

The outliers…I had to fail someone in the training class. Or find a divergent and deliver them to her.

"I need to know that you can recognize a divergent when you find one," Jeanine went on to explain, "statistically there must be at least anywhere between ten to fifteen divergents within each faction. I want you to find them…and bring them to me."

"What do you want with them?" I asked curiously.

"When you deliver," Jeanine said slowly, "I'll show you."

I nodded and agreed with her, "okay."

"And once you deliever them to me," Jeanine went on, "I've got an evern bigger job for you."

I was used to Erudites' cryptic reasons. Divergent were a constant subject when I was growing up with them. The way we talked about them as kids made them seem like monsters in a story. Crazy wild animals that couldn't be controlled and would become killers was how all divergent stories went. I wasn't a child anymore, and in all of my adult life I had never come across a single divergent. I weren't even sure if they were real.

All I could imagine now was me delivering a whole batch of them right to Jeanine's door step. I'd go down in Dauntless and Erudite history. The more I thought about it the more passionate and sure I became of myself. This was what dauntless was about, protecting others from those who were dangerous. I would become the biggest Divergent hunter that anyone's ever seen.

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	6. Chapter 6

Today was my favorite day of training. We were getting into more tricky weapons that a gun. Now we were onto knives. Everyone was all lined up with a table of various knives next to them. Too bad a lot of the sucked at throwing them, I walked up and down the lines observing each of them. Mentally noting who had good form and who didn't. Four was standing by watching as well. We hadn't spoken since that day in my office. I stopped at Tris.

She glanced over her shoulder, she knew I was here. She became tenser and twirled the knife in her hand nervously to the point that she ever dropped if before she threw it. She scrambled quickly, picking it up. My presence bothered her, in some sort of way it pleased me. I had an effect over her.

I watched as she threw a few knifes into the wall, she must be getting used to me. She was good…well better than anyone else her. So this was her vice. She easily sunk three knifes into the painted circle on the target.

"You're kinda good at this," Christina nodded happily.

Tris grinned girlishly.

I moved on down the line, stopping at Al. This throwing arm was terrible. The knife got away from him easily, not even hitting the wood around the target. Instead it bounced wildly on the concrete ground.

"That was pathetic," I noted waiting for a reply from him.

He sighed frustrated.

"It slipped," he murmured quietly.

"Well go get it," I yelled loudly.

Tris looked over her should at me. I glanced; back she usually looked so sheepish and scared when she looked at me. She didn't now, she was getting braver.

"What, while they're throwing?" Al asked quietly again.

"Are you afraid?" I asked calmly.

"Of being stabbed by an air borne knife? Yeah," he murmured again.

"Everybody stop!" I declared as the gym became quiet.

Tris turned away from me again. Al turned away from me too, like a sheep caught in a wolf den.

"Stand in front of the target," I ordered.

He still wouldn't look at me as he slowly waked over to the target, with his head hung low.

"Four give me a hand here," I also ordered. Perhaps it was time to test more than one person here. Once Al was in position I said, "You're going to stand there while he throws those knives…and if I see your flinch… you're out."

Time to eliminate the outliers.

"One thing you will learn here is that orders are not optional," I said now casting a glance at Four, making sure he heard me.

But he had his back to me too while he pulled knives off the table…I was getting really tired of everyone having their back to me. Four had the knives in hand and stood next to Tris who looked solemn. As For was turning them over in his hand, I could already see Al sweating bullets.

"Stop," came a voice from behind me, I was too focused on Al. It was Tris

"Anyone can stand in front of a target it doesn't prove anything," She said quickly and anxiously. The tension hung thick in the air as the other initiates avoided my eye contact. But she didn't, Tris stared straight at me challenging me. She was becoming bold; in the back of my mind I began picturing her as a graduated Dauntless woman. Maybe she did have what it takes; regardless she had a long way to go.

"Then it should be easy for you to take his place," I replied to her calmly.

Al walked away looking relieved, while Tris confidently strode over to the target.

"Same rules apply," I ordered and looked to Four.

Quickly he hurled the knife…it landed in the wood with a loud thud just to the right of her upper thigh.

"Aw, c'mon Four," I prompted.

For turned the second nice over in his hand again, throwing it to the left of her head.

"You can get closer than that," I said giving him a sideways glance.

I could tell that he knew what I was doing, I was giving him an order too but he still played along with the little game I had made. She still hadn't flinched. I was seriously impressed…not that I would let anyone know that.

"You want me to give her a little trim?" Four asked.

"Yeah maybe just a little off the top," I instructed.

Once more, he threw the knife puncturing only a few inches above her head. With the last one he hurled it immediately landing night by her head. She pulled away slightly, raising her hand up to her ear. She was bleeding…and she didn't flinch once.

"Points for bravery stiff," I awarded her…but I felt cheated. I got a reaction out of her not even five minutes ago just for standing next to her, now from ordering her superior to throw knifes at her I got nothing, "But not as many as you just lost for opening your mouth."

I got closer to her… I wanted a real reaction from her, "you watch yourself. We train soldiers, not rebels."

I directed to everyone else, "alright we're done for today, get out."

Everyone dispersed as I headed back to the leaders quarters while the initiates headed downstairs to their dorms. Four and Tris were still back at the table. I wondered why she was saying to him…I wanted to know what she was thinking. I still feel like I didn't get enough of a reaction out of her. However once I realized that I was brooding over some stiff initiate I quickly shoved it from my mind. However she does have a talent with knives, and I had another report due at the end of the week. If I could pin point one initiate and their talent it would sure as hell help my report.

She could use more guidance with it though, there was room for improvement. Once the gym was empty I went over to a closet where we stored more supplies. I pulled out another target for knife throwing, except this one was more realistic and difficult. It was basically like a human dummy, it was easy to set it up any way you wanted. There were a few target points painted onto it, on the head, the heart, the stomach, they were all over it.

I set it up near the knives, thinking over what I was about to do. I had another plan in mind too…one that was guaranteed to get a reaction from her.

I headed towards the dorm…stopping at the top of the stairs. I heard Peter's voice…

He was reading the daily reports, talking about Abnegation. I read it earlier today too. A reporter from Erudite was slamming Tris's parents since both of their kids transferred out. It hauntingly reminded me of what Jeanine had told me last night about Abnegation. I spent plenty of times to know that Erudite could hide behind their big words and their ideas when they had something bigger planned. I didn't know much about abnegation, nothing more than they were all a bunch of stiffs. Except Tris didn't come off to me as the type of kid who got beat on as a kid, I could hear her defending them. Talking about how they were good people.

The arrogant Peter kept running his mouth off. I needed to stop him. I strode down the stairs, no one noticed me at first. I could see the distraught look on Triss' face when I came down.

"Tris!" I yelled out loudly. Many in the dorm jumped, including Tris, "come with me."

Everyone fell silent, as Tris shuffled around uncomfortably. She didn't say anything as started up the stairs; I could hear her behind me.

"Oh someone's in trouble," Peter said annoyingly.

I turned around, Tris nearly ran into my from behind, her arm brushed up against mine, "shut up Peter."

I continued back up the stairs with Tris now a more respectable distance behind me. I lead her back into the gym over to the more complex target.

"You're good at knife throwing," I said going over to the table picking up a few of the smaller sharper ones.

Tris didn't say anything behind me. I picked up four of them and walked over to her. Now that she was close to me, I could see she was changing. She looked good in that tank top and now I could see her tattoo up close. Three birds on her collar. Her arms were more defined, instead of scrawny and small she was lean and was finally getting some muscle. She kept her eyes to the floor, she still looked upset.

"You ok?" I asked her.

"I'm fine," she replied simply.

"Don't listen to Peter," I said shaking my head, "he's an arrogant little bastard."

"It's not Peter I'm worried about," she replied. She was talking about the article, I could tell.

"Just ignore all the bullshit," I said shaking it off, "you got bigger things to worry about."

I could tell that didn't satisfy her, "besides if there was an article for every time my pops hit me there'd be a dissertation on it in the paper."

Now she looked up at my face, she was becoming less childlike by the day, "Really? You're parents hit you?"

I turned away from her grimacing, "doesn't matter…you're dauntless now…faction before blood."

She rolled her eyes at me. Out of all the women in my life that did that to me it bothered me the most when she did it.

"Throw it at the target," I commanded her.

She took the knife and lazily threw it at the target. It hit hear the hip of the dummy but didn't stay in.

"Harder," I ordered.

She took the next one and took a deep breath. She concentrated hard and threw it…landing in the second ring on the stomach target.

"Throw a little to the left of what you're aiming for," I told her seeing how her throwing was.

"Huh?" She asked confused.

"Like this," I said wanting to see just what kind of a reaction I could get from her. I stepped behind her, my large frame over shadowed her small petite frame. I heard her breath hitch, I wanted to chuckle but didn't. I reached over putting my hand on top of hers where the knife was and pointed the tip.

"See how the tip is pointing right at the center," I said in her hear. She still wasn't breathing.

She nodded though.

I hold her hand pulling slightly to the left, "throw it now."

I took a step back, wondering if it would work.

She took a deep breath again and threw the knife. Just like I assumed it landed right in the center of the target. Now I chuckled quietly. She turned to me with a huge smile plastered on her face.

"Do it again, aim for the head this time," I instructed her.

She looked more nervous now; the head was a smaller target. Still, she turned the knife over in hand and tossed it. She missed, it flew past the head and ricocheted on the ground. I could tell her body tighten up; she was waiting for me to chastise her.

"Try again," I said calmly.

She took the third knife raising it.

"Aim left," I corrected her.

She did, aiming a little more left and tossed it. it landed perfectly in the middle of the dummy's face. I smirked. She was good.

"Now the heart," I said trying to change it up.

She was getting confidant and better. She picked up more knives and tossed them. I gave her more tips telling her to change this way and that. She hit the targets perfectly a few times and hardly missed it.

"Feeling cocky are we?" I asked her raising an eyebrow.

She turned to me flustered, "No."

"Alright…" I said strolling over to her with the same smirk, and walked around her, "wanna change it up?"

"How?" She asked curiously.

I smiled deviously, walking over to the table I picked up the bigger knives handing it to her, "come with me."

Together we walked away from the dummy and back to the wooden board from before.

"This again?" Tris asked obviously unimpressed.

I walked in front of the target and stood there. I wrapped my arms around my back. Facing her sternly and nodded my head.

"What?" Tris asked, "Are…are you serious?"

"Do it," I told her.

"No," She shook her head.

"Do it," I said more stern, "do it… or you're out."

"What if I hit you?" Tris asked me shrugging.

"Are you afraid that you'll hurt me?" I asked of her, curious to her reaction.

She started to blush…that was a new reaction. She looked down at the big knife, then up at me. I nodded again, prompting her to do it.

Slowly she rose up the knife staring intently at me; she kept staring to the sides of me really. Now she was deliberately avoiding my eye sight. She threw the knife weakly…it didn't even land in the wood.

"C'mon you can do better than that," I exclaimed.

She sighed and shook her head, and raised another knife. She threw it more forcefully, this time landing up near my chest about six inches away.

"Throw one right here," I said pointing up towards my heart.

She looked nervously at me, shaking her head. She looked terrified; she really was worried about hurting me.

"Today initiate," I repeated to her with a small grin.

She was getting frustrated; I could see it on her face. She raised the knife with a dark gleam in her eye.

I raised my hand indicating with my thumb to aim to the left.

She nodded, and let the knife go. In a matter of quick few seconds the knife came pelting at my face. I rose up my hand quickly feeling the blade of the knife cut through my palm, but caught it well enough to not do any real damage.

Holy shit, she really did it. I started laughing, I was impressed. I dropped the bloodied knife, thinking nothing of it. The cut wasn't that deep, I've had worse.

Tris ran up to me looking like she was on the verge of tears, "Oh my God. I- I- I'm so sorry Eric."

"Don't worry about it," I shook my head flexing my fingers, "nothing to bad."

"Here," she said quickly pulling out a small handkerchief from her back pocket. She wrapped it around my hand, staining it red.

I glanced up at her…feeling my nerves act up kinda like When Jeanine comes around.

"I'm sorry," Tris said again, practically shaking from fear.

"Careful," I said to her grimacing, "you're abnegation is showing…alright we're done you can leave."


	7. Chapter 7

I felt like a kid at Christmas right now, tonight was the war game to end the physical training. We were going to go play capture the flag, a favorite of mine. I was stoked; me and the other leaders haven't have the change to go out in play in a while with all the extra work from Erudite. Although with my hand being in the state that it was, it would be more difficult.

I managed to bandage up the cut easy enough, but using it still made it tear back up and bleed again. Too bad it was with my dominate hand, writing on a piece of paper, opening a door or holding a war game gun was going to be painful. Every time I felt it I thought about her. Tris, the stiff.

I seriously didn't think that she was going to pelt the knife at my face…but in my mind I was ready for if she actually did, sort of. It was a small painful reminder of that night and since then I couldn't stop thinking about her. There were many curious things about her. One of them being that she transferred from Abnegation, I couldn't think of a single Abnegation that had transferred to Dauntless…well except Four. They typically couldn't take it here, and yet she had the full potential too.

Another curious thing about her was this letter I got from Jeanine about her. She was telling me that she wanted me to keep an eye on her for some undisclosed reason. The next stage of training mental, I typically don't administer the tests but Jeanine asked me to specifically run all of Triss' test. Jeanine even sent me the results to her test, she got abnegation. Does Jeanine think that she could be divergent?

Then again…is she? I can tell she still lovers her family and her original faction. That was the only thing that made me think that doesn't have what it takes to be Dauntless. Whether she liked it or not, we were her family now. She was smart too, well she had the making to be anyways except we weren't testing her on her brains here.

In the gym, it was the last day of physical training. Tonight was the war game. Sure, Tris was good at knives but she needed to be better than that. Then again, if Tris was divergent I could just find a way to get her out of Dauntless. Then I'd never have the chance to find out if she really is or not. I would be eliminating an outlier just like Jeanine wants. Would it be considered obstruction of justice if I were to find an excuse to throw out Tris for a different reason than possibly being divergent? Whatever Jeanine wanted from the divergents, I didn't think she'd get the results she was looking from her. In the back of my mind I started questioning why I was bothering trying to protect Tris from Jeanine but quickly shoved it away from fear…no concern, of what the answer would be.

Tris wasn't that good at fighting… but she had the motivation to win this fight.

"First fight: Peter versus Tris!" I called out loudly to everyone.

I could see Triss' face sink immediately from across the other side of the gym.

Christina started to say something to her, I think I heard my name come up but I didn't listen to intently. Peter stepped up onto the ring, cocky. As Tris started to head to the ring I saw Four grab her arm and started talking to her. What were they talking about? I wanted to know…

One Tris got into the ring, the two of them took their stances. Neither of them really went for a punch for while.

"Alright there stiff? Are you about to cry? I'll take it easy on you if you cry?" Peter said toying with her.

Waste of time, I thought to myself. I glanced at Tris, she looked nervous but a part of me knew that deep down she could do it. If she can throw a knife at my face, she can take Peter on for at least a fair fight. Her nerves got to the better of her however, Peter for a few clean hits on her. Tris managed to punch him in his throat knocking the wind out for a moment but Peter was skilled. He managed to get a good hold on her and threw her down to the floor with a loud thud. She groaned in pain.

"Come on, stop playing with each other," I said but more or less directing it at Tris. I knew she could do it if she pushed herself a little harder.

She managed to pull herself back up, but Peter was quick and knocked her down again. She hit her head hard on the floor, her eyes were getting hazy. She looked up at me and then past me at something else. I glanced over my shoulder…Four was walking away. why was she looking at him. I didn't have a chance to really see what Peter did next, but he got a hard hit to her face.

Tris lied there limp. I waited a few seconds hoping she'd regain consciousness and come back…but she didn't.

"Alright," I said swallowing a lump in my throat, "Tris is out!"

There was a tension of shock that spread through the initiates like wildfire.

"Al! Chris!" I demanded, "Take Tris to the hospital wing, next fight it Edward and Zack!"

Surprisingly enough the rest of the fights were rather well. I could already tell who was going to be cut and who would be in the top. After a few more hours I told them to all go get dressed at head to the trains. I went to the supply closet grabbing the bag full of the dart guns and was strategically planning out the team I wanted. In the back of my mind, I was happy Tris was finally out. At least now Jeanine wouldn't be able to get to her…that was if she was divergent.

As the sun was setting and the night was on the excitement was growing. I gather everyone up with a duffle bag of guns strung behind me. Four was with me, he looked grim. Someone must've told him Tris was out now. I remember him walking away from the fight.

"Alright everyone," I yelled to the lot of them, "move out."

Together we all piled onto the stationary train, heading over to the abandoned fair grounds. There was a general feel of excitement amongst everyone, even Tris's friends seemed happy despite the fact she wasn't here. With everyone on the train, it slowly started moving. I was leaning up against the door, polishing my own gun. The others all had red ones, I took one and customized it myself and painted in black. I had a feeling that no one would be as excited about this game once they realized what the bullets were going to be. I couldn't help but smirk at the prospect of telling them.

From back in the compound, something caught my eye. I glanced up surprised at what I saw. It was Tris, all dressed and ready to go. She was running after the train with a look of determination on her face. After the beating she took, she was running pretty fast to catch the train. She kept glancing up at me, looking for reaction. I just kept a emotionless gaze as she gathered speed as was now running along with the train right next to me.

Impulsively I held out my hand to her, she took it quickly and I pulled her up onto the train.

"Thanks," she nodded in between breaths.

"Who let you out?" I asked bluntly.

"I did," she nodded as her long hair fell into her face.

She looked good…for taking such beating earlier that was, "you did?"

"Yeah," she chirped looking so sure of herself. I half expected her to at least buckle under my gaze a little bit. But she didn't, she just held that same determined face…maybe she really was a Dauntless after all. Everyone was silently watching us, possibly waiting for me to push her back off the train. I didn't feel like I should, she didn't deserve it. She was pretty ballsy for what she was doing.

"Okay," I nodded looking from the others back to her. I wanted to keep looking at her face… I didn't really know why though. There were others around watching us though; this wasn't something I wanted them to see.

"The games simple," Four said called coming up to me with his orang glowing flag, "just like capture the flag."

"Weapon of choice," I called out holding up my dart gun for everyone to see.

"You call that a gun?" Molly sneered to Peter.

I pointed the gun at Molly's leg and pulled the trigger. She fell against the wall of the train grunting painfully.

"Neurostim dart," I explained as many people around grimaced, "stimulates the pain of a real gunshot wound, only lasts a couple of minutes. Two teams, Four and I are captains."

"You pick first," Four offered handing out guns to everyone.

"Okay," I said prepared, I could feel my inner competitiveness coming out, "Edward."

Four smirked, "I'll take the stiff."

Tris blushed as she slung the gun around her shoulder.

"Oh, picking the weak ones so you got someone to blame when you lose?" I said smugly.

"Something like that," Four shrugged.

There was no way that Fours' teams was going to win this. We all went through selecting out teams, I took all the best gunmen and fighters we had. We all prepped up putting on our gear and loading up the guns. Within a few minutes we stopped outside the fair grounds. My excitement was building; it would be a perfect night to play. The crescent moon offered limited light to the grounds and there were plenty of places to hide the flag. I already knew where it was going.

"Alright," I said opening the door and hopping down, "my teams enters the grounds first. After five minutes you guys can come in after us, games start in fifteen."

I gave them a small sadistic smile as Four's team eyed me competitively while I instructed my team to run in. I was dividing up the team, half to go find the flag and half to guards the grounds near where I was putting. I decided to hide it at the top of a clock tower where I would stay and guard it, and placed my entire defense near the bottom of the tower. Anyone who comes near us would get blasted. This was going to be easy.

When all my team was in position we waited for the fifteen minutes to be up, and everyone moved out. I sprinted to the top of the tower and draped the flag over the railing inside the small room.


	8. Chapter 8

I loved being up here, I remember running away to the fairgrounds all the time when I was little. I always walked around wondering what the rides would be like if they actually worked. No one ever bothered to reopen the fairgrounds after the war, each faction all had different reasoning. I always wanted to be on the rides, see how they worked. As a kid I used to day dream that I'd figure out a way to get them up and running again. I even tried a few times and just ended up electrocuting myself.

Everything in Dauntless was so fast paced and loud. Up here…everything was so still and peaceful. It was like the world just stopped for a moment and being up here I could soak up all the loneliness and silence of it all. I never told anyone that I still come up here by myself at night sometimes. It was my thing, I enjoyed the solitude of it all for what little moments I can.

Except with all the new work that Jeanine has me doing, I haven't been able to come up here in months. I scanned in between the rides and abandoned food stands. I saw Fours team standing near the big circular one with wooden animals all around it. They all seemed unsure of what to do…except one. Even from far away I could recognize her long flowing hair as she headed for the biggest ride that was here. I think it's called a Ferris wheel; she started climbing up the ladder. With someone right on her tail, Four.

In the siege of the moment I realized I felt a flash of jealousy…and quickly reprimanded myself for feeling that way. What the fuck did I care if Four was hanging around her. She's MY initiate, I'm her leader. I had been catching myself thinking about her a lot lately ever since she cut up my hand and hated myself every time I realized it. However in this quiet moment where the world seemed to stop… I had the chance to question why. Why was I bothering to try to protect her? If I really did suspect that she was divergent I should turn her over to Jeanine. That'll put a good mark on my record. But I couldn't believe that this girl was a threat. Not to anyone.

She was still climbing up the ladder, higher and higher. Four, the coward that he was with heights, was straggling behind. _I wish I was there I'd be right behind her_ , ran through my mind quickly. As quick as it came was just how fast I pushed it out. Climbing up the rusty ladder, a step to it fell out and she fell slightly. I gripped anxiously harder onto the railing in front of me as she fell; Four was behind her and caught her hip. Seeing that only made my grip the railing harder. They stopped for a moment, just talking… I wondered what about.

She would see my flag from up where she was. I turned my focus down to the ground near my tower. All my defensive initiates were in position; some of Four team were walking down on the ground aimlessly in the wrong direction looking for my flag. From up here I scanned all of the grounds unable to find the orange glow of their flag. They must've hidden it well.

Directing my gaze back up to the Ferris wheel I realized Four and Tris were gone. I couldn't even see them on the ground. They must be heading for me. Good, let the real game begin, bring it on. I gripped my gun ready to go. Within a matter of minutes I saw Fours team closing in on mine. I grabbed a flare from my pocket and quickly lite it up.

"I can see them!" Edward called out from before.

"Light em up!" I yelled out to them dropping a flare into position. A few more sparked to light emitting a red glow making it easier to see.

I stood there patiently watching. The small blue darts were flying everywhere; my team had a good vantage point. I told them where to hide and when to attack. Many of Fours team fell easily. A few of mine did too, but what surprised me again was Tris. Peter had managed to catch Christina holding a gun up to her. Tris came up from behind him shooting him in the leg. I chuckled; I didn't think she really had it in here. In all of the chaos I saw Tris sprint to the door and quickly entered the building.

 _Perfect_ , I thought to myself as I heard her boot clunking up the stairs. I turned my back to the flag standing near the opening on the floor…waiting for her. Her footsteps stopped near the small trap door, slowly she pushed it open. I immediately shot at her…and missed…on accident. She fired back but missed me too. A few more shots at me and I spotted her problem again.

"Aim left stiff," I commanded.

She looked at me curiously still only holding the trap door just enough for her gun to peer through. She opened it a little wider hold the gun to me and aimed left… I quickly ducked dodging it easily with a grin on my face. It was kinda funny to see the look of frustration on her face. She clicked the gun at me a few times but she was out of bullets.

Growling she threw the gun to the ground and lunged at me. I let her tackle me, giving her one fair attempt. She managed to throw me to ground impressively enough and held me there for a moment.

If I thought that being up here made the world seem to stop…seeing this girl on top of me seemed to make everything stop. The world, time…my heart. She just stood there holding down my arms; I could feel her heavy breathing on my face. Now with how close her face was to me I could see it…she wasn't a girl she was a woman. This training had down her good; she was now toned in all the right places. That familiar look of ambition and dauntless spirit was in her eyes. However even with the Dauntless spirit she seemed confused and worried in waiting for me to do something. I was waiting for her to do something…but she didn't. We both just laid there at the top of this quiet lonely little clock tower watching each other.

Once the reality of what was happening came flooding back to me, I pushed her off and tried to grab at her. She ducked out of the way rolling on the ground quickly. I made another attempt to grab at her with, giving her a chance to punch me hard in my throat. I gasped from the impact, feeling my throat dry up and the air leave it quickly. In my moment of grasping for breath, she pushed me backwards against my chest making me trip of an old wooden crate.

I saw her sprint over to the flag hanging on the rail and she ran out onto the ledge waving it happily. Down below there were victorious cries from Fours team…but I hardly heard it. I just stayed sitting where I was watching her, secretly wishing we could hide out here a little longer. Wishing she would stay here with me a little longer.

She turned around to me and her smile quickly faded to nothing more than a small grin.

"Are you ok?" she asked unsure.

"Yeah," was all I could muster out, I couldn't think of any witty sarcastic comment to make. In fact I could think of anything to say.

Tris headed towards me holding out her hand to me.

I felt my spine trickle at seeing her offer to help me; I took her hand pulling myself up. I didn't let go of her hand once I was up though…she didn't let go of mine either even though we were barley holding onto each other now.

I couldn't do this, in needed to make her squirm. With a devious grin I said, "You know we could stay up here a little long if you want to."

Tris quickly released my hand and started blushing furiously. She now kept her gaze down as she started to head for the trap door. I grinned secretly to myself. Seems like the people on Fours team wasn't the only one who had a victory… I got her to blush and that was just the reaction I was looking for. I win and right now that was all I cared about.

At the end of the game we all gathered together gathering up our guns and strength back. My team was all gathering around me sulking; I could tell they didn't understand why I was grinning so happily. Fours team were all hugging and high fiving Tris. It was a very divided group, no one could really believe how the game had ended, even Four seemed impressed as his eyes never left Tris. I could see the way he was looking at her…and my secret jealousy wanted me to punch him out. In thinking about Four, I thought of a perfect way to end the night. A way to get Tris away from Four's enamored gaze.

"Anyone wanna take a short cut back?" I called out as stopped and turned to the group before we got to the train.

"What shortcut?" Edward asked, bringing some light back to his sulking eyes.

I glanced at Tris, she seemed interested to. I could see Four now stalking away slowly towards the train. He knew what I was talking about… I knew he wouldn't do it. Coward.

"Just a little initiation," I explained keeping it vague, I wanted to surprise Tris- well all of them really, "Dauntless style."

I lead the excited group in a run towards the one of the tallest old abandoned sky scraper. Everyone was talking excitedly as we made our way up. Some of the tenured dauntless members who tagged along for the game knew what was at the top. The climb up seemed endless, floor after floor until we finally reached the top floor. It was exhilarating to finally reach the top. Up here, you could see everything in the night time sky.

Tris wandered over to the ledge looking up. I came up next to her watching her as the wind from up here casually made her hair dance. She had the most awe inspired look on her face as she studied the everything before her. Her eyes were gleaming with childlike wonder.

"So beautiful," she whispered letting it get lost in the wind.

"Yeah," I whispered back agreeing with her but not taking my eyes off her face.

"Eric! You wanna go first?" Ezra, a dauntless veteran, asked me holding onto the harness.

"Yeah," I said walking over getting myself strapped in. it wasn't the least bit daunting to see the far fall below me of the city. The shaking of the wire in the wind just made it all the more thrilling.

Ezra held onto the straps and shoved me forward as the pulleys began throwing me down into the urban jungle. It was the closest anyone would ever get to flying, I held out my arms letting my pressure built screams be heard throughout the empty city. Even through the debris of torn down buildings I didn't buckle, I wanted to go faster as the wire was tilted more downward. I was building up speed at a heart pounding pace. I began pulling at the brakes as I skidded down to a hall at a giant illuminated X at the end.

I pulled out of the straps falling down onto my feet jumping around and laughing for adrenaline. I was the first and only one down here, but I could hear the whining of metal on metal as another person was heading towards me. I looked up…it was her. She looked terrified and she wasn't pulling on the break.

"Tris!" I roared out, feeling my heart beat quicken again, "Tris! Pull the break! Now!"

She scrambled up trying to grab it but it look like she could reach it. for one terrible moment I thought she wouldn't make it. Could I catch her and stop her at the rate she's going? At what could have potentially been the last second she finally got ahold of the lever. She pulled it forcefully as the metal began screeching towards me. Slower and slower she approached me until she was mere inches away from the X. she looked exhausted.

I reached up, pulling at the straps and harness; she idle fell out of it…straight into my arms. Responsively, she wrapped her arms around me. Her legs were wobbly and her hands were shaking. I wrapped my arms around her waist tighter so that she wouldn't fall over even though it felt like my legs were getting wobbly.

"You alright?" I asked noting my heart will wasn't slowing.

She started laughing… I've never heard her laugh before. She nodded in between giggles.

I smirked, she looked cute when she laughed, "welcome back home."

"Home?" she asked breathlessly, "I didn't know that a stiff could be home at Dauntless."

"Seems like you're loosening up a bit there stiff," I said quietly as she lifted her head.

She still had a dream face plastered on her face, and her arms were still around my neck. I kept my arms around her waist resting my hands on her hips. Our faces were closer to each other than before, I could feel the tension growing quickly between us…and for one amazing second I thought that she was going to start leaning in to me until…

It was the whining of the metal another Dauntless was heading down. We quickly untangled from each other and it was like a breath of fresh air really. Whatever it was there was going on between us- not that there was…well was there? I didn't fucking now right now, my head was too scrambled with too many things to tell. Still we both had to keep up appearances, no one could know.

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	9. Chapter 9

Tris and I headed back to the pit side by side with everyone else behind us. Everyone still had the adrenaline coursing through them as we all talked and laughed happily. For the first time, Tris seemed like she was actually comfortable around me. Instead of her usual tense as if she's waiting for me to blow up on her. I was enjoying the company of everyone around me, for the first time in a long time it really did feel more like a family than a faction.

"I can't believe I did that," she said shaking her head happily.

"I can," I replied with a small grin. I kept glancing down at her hands, they were still shaking lightly. A part of me wanted to hold them to keep them still. She also still had that blissful smile plastered across her face. I haven't seen her smile like she was now since she joined Dauntless.

"I can't believe I'm still shaking either," she said holding up her hands and glancing up at me.

"It's the adrenaline," I offered her with a shrug, "it'll wear off soon."

"I wish it wouldn't," Tris expressed.

"Well," I said slowly now trying to find the words, "I could take you back up there to do it again if you want."

She dropped her hands and stared at me with the same expression on her face from when she was on top of me at the top of the clock tower earlier, "What you mean…right now?"

"Not right now," I replied shaking my head, "we gotta go find Max to find out your rankings. I mean whenever you want I'll take you back up there."

Tris's face sank; she was worried about her ranking. I did drop points for her score for losing her fight with Peter earlier today. I could even say for sure if she would make it. Max had the final word on who stayed and who went. A deep regret was running through me now for dropping points of her score. What if she did get kicked out because of me?

A thought ran through my head…and I found myself scared to say it. But I wasn't going to be a coward so I said, "we could run away back up to the clock tower too if you want."

Her face snapped up to me, I could see worry all over her face now mixed in with confusion. Did she even know what I was asking her? What was I asking her? I didn't know what I meant by my own statement…I just hoped it would make her feel better.

We finally got to the pit, everyone clamored down the stairs while Tris leaned against the railing gripping it tightly. She started to go pale.

"Are you ok?" I asked standing next to her watching her intently.

"I don't feel so good," she shook her head breathing slowly.

"It's just the nerves mixed with the adrenaline," I explained, "it can make you feel nauseous. You're going to be fine though."

"Why did you attack me when I was…" Tris murmured.

"Why didn't you?" I threw back at her, challenging her.

Tris opened her mouth as if she was about to say something and turned her gaze away from me. She seemed to struggle to swallow a lump in her throat while we both turned out gazes to the sound of someone else's footsteps approaching us.

Goddammit… it was Four. What the hell was her doing here?

"Tris!" he called out approaching us. His gaze softened on her and turned dark when he looked past me at her.

"Hey," Tris murmured quietly as her grip on the railing made her knuckles turn white.

"Congratulation," Four said blandly, his gaze kept shifting between the two of us.

"Thanks," Tris replied with a small nod.

"You know I wanted to say that you did good tonight," Four said shifting awkwardly in his place, "you were brave."

"Yeah," I agreed with him and raised an eyebrow and said, "too bad you couldn't join us on the zip line."

Fours gaze turned even darker and cold as I smirked at him.

"Anyways," he said turning back to Tris, "You should get back to your friends."

He indicated down to the other initiates all gathered together down in the pit with drinks and talking to one another happily.

"Okay," Tris nodded solemnly. She glanced back over her shoulder at me, her expression was unreadable.

As Tris walked down the steps back to her friends, Four gave me a familiar dark glare.

"Is there a problem?" I asked him putting on my equally dark glare.

"I don't know," Four shrugged, "you tell me."

"Why don't you start with what was going on up on top of that Ferris wheel?" I asked him with a raised eyebrow, "What do you need some girl to help you put on your big boy pants and climb up high?"

Four grimaced, "Why don't you tell me how Tris got past you up in the clock tower?"

Trying to think quickly, the best answer I could come up with was, "Well apparently you must be doing your job once for right because she actually got past me all on her own."

Four clenched his fists and stepped closer to me dropping his voice, "I know you've been having those meetings with Erudite. I've seen them loading a bunch of supplies into Dauntless."

"What now your snooping around?" I asked feeling my blood boil.

"What's going on Eric?" Four demanded, "what are you hiding."

"That's none of your concern," I replied coldly, "if you remember correctly…any sort of relations between an initiate and a leader is strictly prohibited."

Four sighed tensely, "If you hurt her… I will kill you."

His empty threats didn't scare me, "go ahead."

As usual, Four did nothing. He just shook his head and stalked away down into the pit. Fuck him, the asshole. He goes following her around like a lost puppy and bitches at me about keeping her safe…if it was anyone that could keep her safe it would be me. I turned heading towards my apartment as my mind started swimming.

What was I thinking? Me, keep her safe? Could I? Should I? Me keeping her safe all depended one factor and one factor alone…whether or not she really was a divergent. There was no way she could be, she had to be Dauntless. She had been proving that she is dauntless ever since she jumped off that first train. She volunteered to go first by jumping into dauntless, she threw a knife at my face; she let herself out of the hospital to join a war game ever after I threw her out.

My mind quickly drew to a blank as I ran into someone in front of me.

"Hey!" I started to say ready to bitch out who ever ran into me and stopped when I noticed who it was, "Max."

"Everything alright son?" he asked with a curious look.

"Yeah," I nodded, "I uh…lost capture the flag game tonight."

Max laughed, "Feeling a bit of a bruised ego are we?"

 _Sure_ , I thought and laughed and muttered an agreement.

"It's alright," Max said patting my shoulder, "we can't always win. Who beat you?"

"Uh," I said wondering what I ought to say, "Tris."

"Really?" Max said in disbelief.

I nodded hoping he'd let it drop.

He started laughing again, "Shit son! I don't blame ya for being bitter."

Thanks man…

"C'mon," Max invited, "let's go let everyone know who made it past the first test. Also tomorrow morning you got a meeting with Jeanine."

"Just me sir?" I asked feeling my heart rate spike momentarily.

"Yeah," Max replied, "says she wants to meet you with about something's. She probably wants to talk about how the initiates are going so far."

"Okay," I nodded trying not to show my inner disgruntlement.

"Go round them up," Max instructed, "Meet me in the cafeteria in five minutes."

He headed down to the cafeteria while I went down to the pit. I picked up a nearby wrench and banged it against the railing. The loud pounding drew everyone's attention up to me. I saw Tris immediately, she was standing around a small fire pit with Christina, Al, Peter and few others. She gazed up at me inquisitively.

"All initiates in the cafeteria," I yelled out loudly as my voice echoed off the walls, "five minutes."

I took my usual place next to Max up on the upper ledge. Below us all the initiates were waiting anxiously to see their rankings. Tris looked terrified…secretly I was terrified. I placed Tris below the red line, her only hope now was that Max moved her back up. Then again, if Tris was out then I could forget about everything. I wouldn't have to worry about protecting her or anything else for that matter. In that moment I made the decision that if Tris was out I would forget about her completely. Realistically whatever sort of small connection there was between us, there was nothing I could do about it. Not that Tris would ever do anything about it either…she hated me.

"If your ranked above the red line, you'll move onto the second stage of training," Max began to explain, "if you're below it, we'll waste no more time on you…here are your rankings."

Everyone watched the board anxiously as the names started to appear. My palms were sweating… Edward, Zach, Sarah…Peter, Andrew… Christina… Molly… Tris Prior. Tris landed at number twenty. Literally the last number before being cut off. My heart sunk and soared all at once. Was that even possible?


	10. Chapter 10

I sat in my office chair anxiously glancing at the clock every few minutes. 8:52, Jeanine was due to be here at 9 for her private meeting with me. I was curious as to what she wanted but I had a dreaded feeling that I knew. Tensions were running high among the initiates now. Horror stories and rumors were spreading between them all about the mental testing for dauntless. I couldn't blame them; fear landscapes were no walk in the park. This was the point where people were going to start failing miserably. This will also be the point that I find out who the divergents are.

I religiously glanced at the clock again, 8:57. I didn't bother organizing my desk, I had my reports, paper work and a few empty coffee cups spread across my desk. It was almost like a silent rebellion against the organized and tidiness of Erudite. I wonder if Jeanine would even notice.

Once more, I turned my head to the clock. The hand counting the seconds was only fifteen seconds away from becoming nine o'clock. Right on que, at the strike of nine, there was a small knock on my door.

"Come in," I called leaning back in my chair, trying to look calm.

Jeanine entered cavalier carrying a small brief case. She smiled at me coldly and said, "Hello Eric, how are you?"

"Fine," I replied, "you?"

"Excellent," Jeanine replied taking a seat at the chair in front of my desk and sat stiffly legs crossed, "thank you for meeting me today."

"Of course," I nodded.

"How is training with the initiates going?" She began speaking softly.

"Awesome actually," I began to say, I know what she wants to hear. I may not be Erudite but I know what she wants, maybe I can silver tongue myself into getting her to back off, "I think we are gaining some great Dauntless members."

Jeanine grinned with a raised eyebrow, "That's great, how are they all adapting to the transfer?"

Her question reminded me of that night with Tris, when she was upset over her family. The whole mentality behind transferring factions, as harsh as it may be, is that once transferred you forget about everything about who you were before and embrace your new family. Especially when switching from Abnegation to Dauntless for god's sake.

"I think all the right people are adjusting," I began to say with a charismatic smile, "I think it was our annual war game we all played. It felt like everyone really bonded that night."

"Excellent," Jeanine continued, "and the next stage of training, how do you feel about it with all those who passed to the next level?"

If there was a hint of worry on my face it took everything within me to conceal it, but I had to give an honest answer, "If they're not strong enough to face their fears I'll find out…and make sure that they're taken care of."

"It's not so much the weak ones I'm worried about," she said, all smiles fading from her face. I knew what she was asking for, the tension was growing thick in my office but I had a feeling it was only one sided. I need to tell her what she wants to hear.

"I think there may be some divergents in the initiates," I said with a cold look in my eyes, "I'm not entirely sure who or how to pinpoint them though."

I knew Jeanine was not going to let me get off without turning in at least one Divergent to her. If I didn't I'd never get a spot on her team.

She raised her eye brow as her stare become colder and more serious, "Are you going to be able to find them?"

"Yes," I promised her, "I'll be administering the tests along with Four."

"Actually that won't be necessary," Jeanine replied opening up her brief case and pulled out a small blue vile, "I don't think that Tobias Eaton is competent enough for the tasks I have in mind."

Hey we agree on something, I thought to myself while I didn't bother trying to hide my small smirk.

"I need to know that I can trust you to deliver," Jeanine began to explain holding up the vile, "this is an improved accelerated hallucination serum. We've managed to ramp up the effect it has on the brain."

"What do you mean?" I asked trying not to show any tension.

"This new serum will accelerate the fear landscapes," Jeanine began to explain and handed it to me, "the serum is designed to reach a whole new level within the brain. It will manifest on anything in the brain that it can find and interpret their worst fears in a much more dynamic and intense way. It will feel more realistic to everyone than ever before."

This was cruel…but there was a truth in this serum. True Dauntless members should be able to handle this.

"There is a slight defect in the serum however," Jeanine began with a shift in tone in her voice, "we theorize that this serum will be ineffective on divergents."

I gripped the serum tighter, "How do you know?"

"We tested it some divergent we apprehended from Abnegation," Jeanine replied.

"You found some?" I asked surprised by her words. So, they were real then.

"Indeed," she nodded as her eyes seemed to darken dramatically, "the results from the experiments were…inconclusive."

"So what did you do?" I asked wondering if she would give me a real answer instead of some cryptic one.

"We terminated the rouges," Jeanine replied as if it were nothing.

I could feel the tension in my office shifting, and now I could tell that Jeanine could feel it too as she shifted in her seat.

"Eric," she began, "I need to know that I can trust you. Trust you to be honest in handing over the divergents and that you are competent enough to find them within your faction."

I sighed coldly, "I understand."

"There is one other thing that I wanted to speak to you about," Jeanine said as she reached into her briefcase pulling out some files, "I want you to look over all the initiates first test so you can better interpret their new results."

"Okay," I said simply enough looking over files briefly.

"Also keep a close eye on Beatrice Prior," Jeanine demanded softly.

I glanced up at her; she reminded me a lion moving in for the kill.

"Any reason why?" I asked trying to keep it as contempt as I could.

"Let's just say I believe there is more to her than I believe meets the eye," Jeanine replied.

I put the files down on the rest of my already littered desk, "anything else I can do for you?"

"No, that's all," Jeanine said with a fake smile plastered on her face. She stood up and held her hand out to me, "Thank you for everything Eric. I trust that you won't disappoint me and I look forward to working with you."

I shook her hand and returned the fake smile, "Thank you and likewise."

Jeanine got up gathering her briefcase and headed for the door when she turned to me, "Eric, I need to press on you the seriousness of this job. I need results from you."

"I understand," I nodded hoping she'd believe me.

"Good," Jeanine replied, "Because I'm sure as you remember the contract that you signed when you applied for the job is very sound."

I already knew what clause of the contract she was talking about, at the time I didn't think anything of it…and now…

"If you can't deliver or you fail to meet the requirements needed from you unfortunately we will have to terminate you," Jeanine said coldly.

I was so sure of myself back then; I remember reading the clause within the contract and being shocked. The secrecy of whatever Jeanine was planning had deadly repercussions if failed. My life was on the line with this job if I couldn't preform. Back then, it seemed like nothing and now it seemed like biggest risk I'd ever taken with my life.

"I understood all the risks in signing that contract," I began to reply to her; "I wouldn't have signed it if I didn't agree to it."

Jeanine smiled this one seemingly more genuine, "excellent. You'll make a great higher up leader of Dauntless one day."

Me? A higher leader…that was everything I'd ever dreamed about. I even fantasized of taking Max's position of being head of Dauntless one day but never actually believed that it was possible.

"Thank you ma'am," I replied unable to hide my smile at the idea of moving up in the ranks.

She nodded as she exited my office. I could feel a war being born within myself. Of course I wanted to climb higher up in the ranks, working with Jeanine would surly get me there quicker, but at what costs? All this for Tris? Is she even really worth all the strife I was putting myself through? Maybe I should just let her be with Four. Even more so, if she did come out divergent was I really going to turn her in? What did it matter if I gave Tris over to Jeanine, she was nothing to me. There was no option for her to be more than nothing to me. She either had to pass her final test without fail, fail her test and become factionless or even better…not be Divergent.

My mood didn't improve all day as my mind with swimming with dark thoughts. I barley talked to anyone and had a scowl on my face that could kill. So later that night, in the cafeteria when I saw Four I decided to break the news to him.

"Four!" I called out aggressively.

Four looked up at me and grimaced when he saw me. I looked around at the table, he was sitting with Christina, Al and Tris. For the brief moment when Tris's eyes connected with me, she smiled at me. I kept my scowl on my face to which she noticed as her face sank. I glanced back at Four and indicated for him to follow me. He did as I lead him out of the cafeteria out into the empty hallways.

"What?" Four asked cut throat.

"Change of plans," I explained to him, "I'm going to be administering everyone's tests."

"What?" Four replied angrily, "you can't just-"

"Four!" I replied coldly trying to find a way to make him understand without giving away too much, speaking as quietly as I could I went on to explain, "Just shut up! Listen… I have new orders from people higher up that me and you. I have to administer the test for everyone."

"What are you planning Eric?" Four whispered furiously back.

"It's not me!" I replied as a few people came out of the cafeteria passing them without a second glance. I waited until they were far away enough, "Erudite is planning something…but I don't know what it is. They won't tell me yet."

"Yet?" Four asked crossing his arms.

"It's on a need to know basis," I rolled my eyes at him, "look…we _all_ just need to watch our backs and shut up right now. If you know what's good for you you'll stop sneaking around too."


	11. Chapter 11

This new serum Jeanine designed was brutal. Far worse than anything anyone in my training class ever had to do. Molly had just finished up her test, stuck out in the middle of the ocean drowning. She actually didn't stop breathing for a time and I had to do compressions on her chest to make her breath again and snap out of the hallucination. She couldn't walk once she came out of it and a few Daunltless leaders had to carry her back to her dorm.

I looked at the clipboard to see who was next, and felt dread when I saw it. Tris Prior. I don't know what I was dreading more, having to administer her test and see how she reacts, temping to find out if she's divergent or not…or just being in a room along with her. I walked over to the open door way.

Christina and Tris sat along the wall with sullen looks.

"Tris," I called indicating for her to go in.

Nervously Tris got up and walked into the room. In the middle was a large lounge chair with transmitters on the side where the head goes. Next to it was a small table with all the supplies I use, the injector gun, a vile of serum…and a report I have to fill out about how her test goes. Next to it was a monitor, a new feature provided by Erudite.

"Take a seat," I offered to her while I loaded up the injector gun with the vile.

As she sat down eyeing me with a blank expression I began explaining to her, "I'm going to inject you with a serum that simulates the part of your brain that processes fear."

"Alright," Tris replied rubbing her sweaty hands on her jeans.

"It induces hallucinations and the transmitters in the serum allow me to see the images in your mind," I continued indicating to the monitor next to the table.

"You can see inside my mind?" she asked with a worried look.

I nodded to her with a small grin that I quickly tried to conceal. A secret part of me is curious to what she thinks about.

"Lean back," I said to her as I lightly put two fingers on her bare shoulder pushing her back.

Her cheeks turned a small pinkish color from the small touch. It crossed my mind idly that she probably has never been touched by anyone as my eye sight lazily traveled across her bare soft shoulders.

 _Stop!_ I reprimanded myself internally, _don't even go there asshole._

I shook my head slightly and squeezed my eyes shut trying to think more rationally as I said, "You're going to be facing your worst fears, most have ten to fifteen bad ones. Being a stiff you'll probably have more."

I glanced at her hoping she'd know I was half joking, but me saying that just drained all the color out of her face. I felt kinda bad for saying it now…

"You have to calm yourself, slow your heart rate and control your breathing and deal with what's in front of you," I finished and held up the injector gun.

Her hair was in the way, I felt my breath hitch. Hope she didn't notice but now she was deliberately trying to avoid my eye sight. With one finger, I carefully pushed back her hair trying to not touch her skin at any point. I noticed she stopped breathing too. Slowly I injected the blue serum into her neck as her eyes fluttered closed.

For a moment, nothing happened. the monitor remained black but another monitor was beeping slowly indicating her heart beat. She laid there looking totally at peace; once again I had a feeling like time had stopped. It was quiet in the small room, nothing but me and this beautiful face sitting there waiting. The longer I looked at her the more I wanted to stare. Like I would never get enough of her, the soft curve of her face and the way her lips naturally curled was enticing. Her lips looked unusually soft… I had to stop doing this to myself.

Her eyebrows began to furrow. I glanced up at the monitor; she was at the fence in an open field. She seemed mostly confused as she looked up to the sky. One by one crows started diving at her, pecking at her face and scratching her arms. She flailed around trying to shove them away. Except there were too many all around her to get away from them.

I glanced down at her, her face looked in pain. Her hands were shaking again. Reflexively…I started reaching out for her shaking hand. I took it and held onto it firmly. I seemed to help the shaking, but what shocked me the most was her hand closed down on mine coiling her fingers in between mine. I stopped breathing for a moment.

Back on the monitor, Tris was running away from the crows. Only now they were attacking her full force. She ended up getting stuck in a pile of mud and was struggling with that and the constant crows. I wish I could stop this, the look of pure terror on her face was… dissatisfying. The heart monitor behind me was beeping furiously. When she finally managed to get herself out of the mud she fell down near a puddle of water. The crows were relentless now…except the look on her face changed. What once was panic and terror was soon soothed away…what was she doing.

Next to me, with my hand still on hers she whispered, "this isn't real."

I was shocked; no one had ever actually spoken during this test. Immediately she bolted up breathing harshly. In response I gripped her hand tighter.

"Hey!" I called out to her while my other hand grabbed her shoulder rubbing it with my thumb as her eyes were pulsing, "it's alright, it's alright! You ok?"

Tris breathed heavily still with watery eyes, she leaned back in the chair releasing my hand and started rubbing her face with her hands.

This was either really good or really bad…

"Tris," I said slowly unsure of what to say to her, "How long do you think you were in the hallucination?"

Tris shrugged awkwardly, sweat was dripping down her face, "twenty minutes?"

"Three," I replied coldly, "four times faster than the average. I've never seen anyone dot that well on their first shot. How'd you get rid of the birds?"

I wasn't watching the monitor when she did that.

"I just…went into the water," she replied watching me.

"Well," I shrugged pulling up her report, "next time it'll be a lot easier."

"I have to do that again?" she cried out.

"Yeah you've gotta practice several times before the final," I replied avoiding her eyes, my mind was racing again and I didn't want her to know, "but you're a natural, you've got nothing to worry about."

Tris sighed and ran her hand through her hair, "Was it always this bad? When you took your tests?"

 _No_ , I said racking my brain, even if they weren't this bad my fear landscape tests weren't exactly something I liked revisiting, "Yes."

"What were you're tests like?" Tris asked curiously.

"What makes you think you can ask me that?" I spat back at her frustrated.

I could see her coil for my harshness but a determination too, "I'm asking because…well you're supposed to train me and help me."

I scoffed, even if it was the truth. I was supposed to be helping her but now I was just feeling some pent up frustration and I couldn't even pin point where it was coming from.

"Besides," Tris started to say again, "you seem like the best Dauntless here…if I'm gonna learn from anyone it ought to be you."

I smirked feeling my ego boost slightly from Tris's compliments. So, she thought I was this high and mighty dauntless leader huh? I felt flattered; lots of people have complimented me before like her. Suddenly coming from her it felt different, like it was the greatest honor I've gotten from anyone. Her compliment to me meant more than the hundred I've received from Max over the years.

I now glanced at her with the same smirk…were her cheeks going pink again? She had the same look in her eyes as she did that night up on the clock tower, the look of curiosity and I don't know…longing?

"I only had two," I replied going back and filling out the paper. I decided to keep in ambiguous but really hoping she'd talk to me more.

"Two? That's it?" Tris asked surprised with a gleam in her eye as if I just confirmed the compliment she gave me, "that's even less than Four's."

My head snapped back at her in an angry surprise look. A surge of jealousy scorched through my like wildfire. How does she know about Four's fears? He never really told me what his fear landscapes were, I just figured out the height on my own. I never gave much thought to his fear landscapes but I guess now thinking about it, it seemed obvious.

"What are his fears?" I asked her with a perhaps to harsh look in my eye.

She turned away from me staring at her hands in her lap. She didn't want to compromise Four.

"When did he tell you that?" I asked her stepping closer to her, throwing the clip board recklessly onto the table.

Tris shrugged still staring at her hands, "I don't know…a few days ago."

"Oh," I said feeling a mix of disappointment and jealousy. I haven't felt like this since my hormonal teenage years. What the hell is this girl doing to me?

"So what are your two?" Tris asked calmly.

"None of your business," I said quickly taking a step back to the table, "good job today Tris, you can go now."

With that Tris sighed seemingly frustrated and got up and left. I threw the clipboard and some empty glass vials against the walls letting them smash into a thousand pieces.


	12. Chapter 12

Any hopes of things getting better were all eliminated by two events. Both of which I hated myself for. I was forced to make decisions based on subliminal orders. Dauntless breeds on obedience…but at what point does it become nefarious over following orders. Max once told me that Dauntless was about standing up for what you believed in. Protecting those that others wouldn't. Even if that means betraying your orders to do what you feel is right in your heart. To Max, that was true bravery. If only I had realized that before and wasn't too much of a fucking coward to not do anything about it .

So the two decisions I had to make in response to some unfortunate events only made me hate myself all the more. I was a terrible person…and one of the most promising leaders of Dauntless in the words of Jeanine's email to me.

The first event happened when Max came knocking on the door to my apartment a little after midnight. I stumbled groggily out of bed and stumbled to the door.

"Wassup?" I asked rubbing my eyes. Once I realized it was Max, I tried to straighten my mangy bed head and straighten up my posture.

"Eric," he said with a deadly serious look on his face, "get dressed and get downstairs to the initiates dorm."

With nothing more said he started down the stairs hastily. I quickly threw on some clothes and sprinted downstairs. Most of Dauntless was eerily silent; I went through the many hallways past the empty gym to the initiate's dorm. At the top of the stairs there were several Dauntless medics gathered around someone, but I couldn't see who. Off to the side I saw Christina hugging Will crying. Tris looked shaken as she stood with Al. Four was sulking in the corner; arms folded looking like he was ready to kill.

"What the hell is going on?" I asked everyone. All eyes turned to me.

"Eric," one of the medics named Lincoln called, "come here."

I headed over to the group of men including Max all gathered around someone. When I got close enough I peered over their shoulders and felt my stomach churn. It was Edward, he was lying on the ground whining in pain, and I could blame the poor bastard. He had extremely bloody gauze covering up one of his eyes. Even with the gauze most of his face and hands were covered in blood.

"What the hell happened?" I demanded looking around to the medics.

One of them held up a bloody fork with a gloved hands, "Someone stabbed him with this."

"What the fuck?" I said under my breath and turned to the all the intiates who were standing at the stairs.

"I wanna know who the fuck did this right now!" I screamed loudly to them, it seemed to jump off the walls and resonate all through Dauntless.

A couple of them jumped…including Tris. They all looked terrified, no one said anything. The only thing that could be heard was the cries of agony from Edward.

"Eric!" Max yelled just as loud and pulled me aside away from everyone.

"I promise you that I will find out who-" I started to say to him angrily.

"No you won't," Max replied calmly folding his hands behind his back.

"What?" I said exasperated.

"Look Eric we need to keep this as quiet as possible," Max said with a calm coolness in his eyes.

"What? Why? If these initiates are attacking each other-," I started to defend but Max cut me off again.

"Jeanine doesn't need to know about this," Max replied boldly, "no one does. We've all come this far, we can't just blow it over one small incident."

"How is this a small incident?" I replied angrily.

"If you want to waste Jeanine's time and my time by looking for the one responsible, running a trial and getting Edward back on his feet then you can go right ahead," Max said irritably with a dead expression, "otherwise you're going to have to kick him out so we can continue on schedule."

I felt like there was an order in there instead of an option. I grimaced darkly looking down at the ground. So, he was going to put this on my shoulders…

He stepped closer to me and started whispering my ear venomously, "Jeanine has a mission for us…all of us that's going to start right when the initiates are done with training. I need all the hands I can get. Jeanine needs us, we don't have time to do all this detective bullshit chasing down someone over a small incident…but they're you initiates. The choice is yours."

A mission? This soon… what were they planning? What did Jeanine say a few weeks ago when I had that meeting with everyone. They wanted to eradicate the Divergent problem. How the hell were they planning on doing that? And of course it was my decision to decide the fate of the one person who has been number one all throughout training. Now I had to decide whether I was going to make him factionless or put off Jeanine's precious plans and put training on hold to find out what the hell happened down in that dorm.

"Go tell the initiates what you plan to do," Max said and nodded towards them, waiting for me.

He wanted to watch me do it. In fact…just from me blowing up on him like I did I had a feeling they might start watching me a lot closer now. I had to be what they wanted me to be. I turned my back to Max.

I felt a flaming rage developing within me. No one would have been able to get away with this before. Things were getting reckless and dangerous. I stalked angrily over to the initiates who all seemed to start buckling at my presence. The medics picked up Edwards on a stretcher and started taking him away.

I took a strong stance, and looked to them coldly and said, "Edwards can't continue his training…so he's out."

There was a murmured shock and a look of disgust from Tris shot at me. I shoved her from my mind; there were bigger things to worry about at this point. They all looked at me, some crying even more and some who just looked shocked and scared that they were going to be attacked next.

"All of you go to bed," I shot harshly, "training resumes in the morning."

Some of them started to scramble down the stairs while I turned around to see Max smiling and nodded at me and headed back to leadership. I sighed frustrated…this was getting bad. How much longer until…

"Eric!" I heard someone call from behind me, it was Tris.

Her following me around wasn't making me feel any better; in fact she was just pissing me off even more. The only way to squash whatever connected there was between us was for her to stay away from me. it angered me that I couldn't get her to stay away.

"I think it was Peter that stabbed Edward," Tris said with wide eyes.

"You think?" I said getting more frustrated, this girl was wasting my time, "Do you have any evidence?"

"Well no-," she said shifting in her place.

"Then you don't you keep your mouth shut," I suggested coldly. I guess it would be better to make her hate me then.

"Because I saw him right afterwards and you just lost your top initiate-," Tris started to explain.

"He's not my top initiate anymore," I cut her off coldly; "everyone needs to watch their backs…okay?"

It would be a lie to say that the hurt in her eyes didn't affect me…a little bit. I glanced up to see another Dauntless leader, Tom my old trainer, watching us. He had moved up the ladder and was sure as hell higher up than me. He was also notoriously close with Max.

"Why is this ok? I don't get it, are we supposed to be cruel? Or just stupid?" Tris expressed frustrated, "or is this just supposed to be a part of the new rules?"

I noticed Tom turned his back rubbing his temples, he was tired and he wasn't looking right now. There was no one here now except for the three of us.

"It is," I said quickly and while no one was looking I grabbed her hand lightly and spoke softly saying, "Tris just…just please quiet."

She looked down at my hand in hers and back up to me, the mood on her face was shifting and her cheeks were turning pink again.

"Please," I begged her hoping that she'd take the hint.

I didn't have time to figure out if she did or not as Tom slowly turned back around stretching his arms as I sprinted past Tris back to my apartment.

The second even was that I had found a divergent…at least I think I did. I ran over my notes from all the tests I administered…and noticed Jacob Arson. He finished his test in seven minutes, two times faster than the average…and four minutes faster than Tris. Jeanine was on my ass about Divergents and Max was now acting mistrusting to me. I had to win them back…but it dawned on me that if I reported Jacob for finishing in seven minutes wouldn't I have to report Tris for finishing in three? I could destroy her records…rewrite them to better benefit her…and I did. I burnt all the files describing her first test and rewrote it saying she finished in twenty-three minutes. I then wrote an email to Jeanine and Max saying nothing more than Jacob Arson.

Then I drank and entire bottle of Jack Daniel's, puked in the garbage can by my desk and laid on the floor of my office with my head spinning as I was thinking about how much I fucking wish that Tris would pin me down to the ground and sit on top of me again.

 **Thank you to all my amazing loyal readers!**

 **Story is about to pick up real soon so that all die hard Eric/Tris shippers will be very satisfied. :D**

 **Also I have a little poll for everyone, I'm thinking of ending the story in one of two ways**

 **I feel like no matter which way I write it, it'll be awesome but I can't make up my mind.**

 **So you guys can help me, so which should it be:**

 **Beautiful Death OR Lonely Ending**


	13. Chapter 13

"Help! Help me!" She called out to no one. She was trapped in a small water tank filling up fast. All around here was dark, there was nothing to see and nothing around.

I kept my eye on the monitor, watching impassively. Praying that she would figure out how to get out of it the Dauntless way. If not… I'd have to write another fake report. The consequences for writing a fake report, especially one like this I knew I'd have a one way ticket down to the bottom of the chasm in a heartbeat.

Tris continued struggling, she tried to kick the glass in. I knew that wouldn't work. The water was rising, and Tris was panicking, her heart rate was sky rocketing. Soon enough the water was at her shoulders, nearly ready to consume her. She tried to savor the air as much as she could, taking one final deep breath in the water filled past her head filling the tank completely. She was going to drown. I started preparing myself for the possibility of having to do compressions on her chest.

Oddly enough, her heart rate started to slow. I glanced as the screen; her eyes were closed but open casually as she stared at her refection in the glass.

"This isn't real," Tris said as she was lying in the sim chair next to me peacefully.

The monitor displaying her hallucination started to go static, we were losing the connection. She started doing something but I couldn't make it out. All I knew was that through a very static connection from what little I saw the glass shattered as the water came pouring out.

Tris bolted up with a panicked gasp.

"How'd you do that?" I asked her confused.

"What?" she asked leaning over in the chair.

"How did you break the glass?" I asked again looking from the report paper to her.

"I don't know," she shrugged, "I just did it."

"You just did it?" I replied and tossed the clipboard on the table rubbing my temples…goddammit. Tris was Divergent.

"What were your test results?" I asked her still rubbing my face with my hands frustrated. I wondered what she would tell me.

Tris paused anxiously; her eyes seemed to widen a bit, "Abnegation."

"I don't believe you," I replied shaking my head.

"Wh- What?" Tris said furrowing her brows.

"I think you're lying to me," I said bluntly…maybe I should try to be nicer. That is, if I wanted her to trust me.

"Why…" Tris said shifter her eyes and moving around in the seat, "why would I lie to you?"

 _Be nice_ , I told myself, "Tris… I know you may not believe me, but it's like you said before. I'm trying to help you…so I'm going to ask you one more time. What were your test results?"

"Abnegation," she said more pressingly.

I sighed and picked up the clipboard again, "alright you're free to go."

Tris looked disappointed; she got up out of the chair and headed to the door.

"Tris," I said before she left and looked directly into her eyes, something rarely do, "Just so you know…Dauntless don't break the glass like that."

Tris breathed a heavy sigh and walked out the door slamming it shut behind her. Damn that woman… she was so infuriating. I couldn't stop thinking about her, and every time I did it just made me angry. She was divergent, I was sure of it. All I could think of was all the tall tales they told us as kids. Divergents were monsters, people hell bent on destroying everything. That wasn't Tris at all, that was obvious. I tempted just turning her over to Jeanine, but the idea scared me.

Now all of Erudite's cryptic explanation for things and unwillingness to explain things even to Max of all people worried me. I felt just like I did before my choosing ceremony. All I wanted to do was get away from Erudite back then, I hated how they did things and how secretive they were. I didn't trust them anymore, but there was nothing I could do at this point. My fate would be sealed if I turned my back on them, the contract ensured that. I still had a chance to protect Tris.

Jacob Arson disappeared. On Sunday, the day that we all rest, Jacob said that he was going to go for a run outside the Dauntless compound. Most Dauntless did including me sometimes so no one questioned it. He never came back from his run though, in a way I knew he wouldn't. All the initiates had asked what had happened to him. They all came to me for answers, and I told them the truth. I don't know what happened to him. Four seemed to have enough sense not to come ask me about it. I hardly saw him around anymore too, probably still sneaking around trying to dig up dirt. Fuck him, I decided. If he wants to be an idiot and stick his nose in places he shouldn't be let him.

The day dragged on with me administering the rest of the tests, filling out reports and talking to Max and other leaders about potential jobs for all the initiates based on their performance…after we finished Jeanine's mysterious mission that was. Max's eyes still shifter to me every once in a while. I think he had people trailing me. The leaders seemed to stick around me a lot more and kept asking me to go out with them at night when the work was done. I tried to carry on as normally as possible.

After our meetings discussing jobs, the dinner bell rang and we all headed down to the cafeteria. As all of Dauntless was heading inside, someone approached me worried.

"Eric!" Christian called running up to me.

"What?" I spat as the other leaders stopped watching us.

"Have you seen Tris?" she asked, she looked exhausted.

Tris? She's gone?

"What do I look like? Her baby sitter?" I shot at her.

"No one's seen her since you did her test with her this morning," she said sounding like she was accusing me. This girl still had some Candor in her.

"She finished her test and I sent her out," I replied and left her as the other Dauntless leaders and I entered.

Where the hell would Tris go? Didn't she understand now was not a good time to be wandering off? I hoped she was ok while I tried to rack my brain of all the possible places she could have gone. Back to her parents, possibly. She had a brother to I think that transferred with her. If I remember correctly her file said her brother went to Erudite. She wouldn't be dumb enough to go to Erudite would she? Maybe she went up to the clock tower…

None of the leaders really talked during dinner. Things seemed much more tense now amongst all of us. I wanted to get out, I needed space. I would go to the clock tower, up there I don't have to hide anything. I don't have to worry about anyone else up there, no one but me.

I excused myself saying I was going back up to my apartment and began to leave. As I was walking around the empty quiet hallways, something I heard caught my attention coming from near the chasm.

"Come on! Get her over!" someone was yelling.

Fucking great, those goddamn initiates are at it again with each other. I quickly started running towards the source of the noise.

"Come on!" I heard getting louder and louder.

"Let me go!" it was Tris…

I started running even faster towards the sound and found three masked men all attempting to push Tris into the chasm, she was close to slipping. I quickly ran up to them grabbing two of them by the back of their shirts throwing them against the wall as hard as I could. One of them hit their head on the rock wall falling to the floor disoriented. Tris now managed to get away and went into the protection of the hallway. I grabbed one of the other guys punching him in his stomach and upper cutting his face as he doubled over. He was out as for the last one he was still standing looking terrified.

"What kind of Dauntless wears a fucking mask?" I demanded grabbing him by the hem of his shirt and ripping the mask off, "Al?"

Al, what the hell was he doing here? I knew this wasn't like him, he was failing miserably at his mental testing. This wasn't his idea. The one who hit his head on the wall regained some conciseness as he picked up the other guy and ran off. I didn't bother chasing them, I turned to Al with my grip still on his shirt. i gave him the most menacing glare I could.

"Get as fucking far away from me and Tris as humanly possible," I threatened shoving him back.

He was pathetic; he stumbled over himself and fell back and quickly scampered away.

Tris was standing in the hallway, shaking. Her pony tail had fallen loose with some strands of hair in her face.

"Tris," I said to her walking over to her grabbing her shaking hands, "you okay-."

There were footsteps on the other side of the chasm, I heard them talking. It was Max and Tom, surly trailing me again.

"C'mon," I said to her holding onto her hands, "we gotta go!"

Tris didn't argue…and didn't release my hand either as she and I sprinted through the halls. I started running to where the train would be waiting, if I was right it was going to leave in about two minutes.

"Where are we going?" she asked breathlessly.

"To a place where the world stops," I explained leading the way.


	14. Chapter 14

The sun was setting…things were quiet now. Now I felt like I could breath and like I could think straight. I sat perched up against the railing outside on the balcony on top of the clock tower. I just kept my eyes towards the sun. It was amazing; the sky was brilliantly orange with glowing pink clouds scattered across the sky. Tris was sitting on the wooden crate she pushed me over with her eyes closed breathing deeply. Still seeing the crate made me chuckle.

She slowly looked up at me, "what are you laughing at?"

"Just thinking…" I said with a small grin, "About how pathetic it is that you pushed me over a crate and that's what made you win the game."

She grinned at it to…I wish I could make her smile more.

"I'm surprised I got past you at all," Tris shrugged looking out the window in the clock tower towards the sun set. She looked so beautiful right now, the sun shone in beams through the window. Her hazel eyes and skin were glowing in the light, her long hair fell into her face in a way that frankly looked sexy.

"I'm not," I said trying to sound sincere.

Tris seemed to sigh frustrated as she closed her eyes again, "really?"

I entered into the clock tower and bent down next to her. I used a finger to prop her face up but drew away…not wanting to get too physical. I already knew I shouldn't be here with her especially. It just felt so right and calming to be up here with her, better than being alone even. We didn't have to hide anything here…if only I could get her to trust me.

"Tris," I began softly, "you have what it takes, I really believe that. You can do this."

She shook her head; I could see she had a lot on her mind it was written all over her face.

"Where did you go?" I said decided to start smaller. I had to take it slow with her.

"To see my brother," she mumbled looking around at a pile of garbage next to us. She was avoiding me.

"In Erudite?" I asked, are you kidding me, "Why the hell would you do that?"

"What?" she said now was getting defensive.

 _Stop don't get mad_ , I took a deep breath and tried, "Why did you go see him?"

"I just wanted to talk to him," she said looking towards the ground.

I wanted to ask about what, but I assumed she wouldn't tell me.

"I can't believe Al," Tris said as her eyes began watering.

"You're moving up through the ranks and he's failing," I said simply, I've seen it before but no one ever got cut for it before, "It makes him hate himself, it makes him hate you. He's just a coward."

"He's my friend!" Tris replied angry now looking at my face but not my eyes.

"He's still a coward," I replied sternly, no one was going to convince me otherwise on this one, "fear does something strange to people like him. but not you, fear doesn't shut you down it builds you up. Like me."

I said that last part with a little sarcastic smile hoping it'd make her smile…and it worked.

Tris now shifted on the small crate she was sitting on, "my brother…he told me that he thinks that Erudite's planning to over throw Abnegation. Do you think they could do that?"

"I wouldn't put it past those bastards," I expressed angrily. So that's their plan huh… Caleb told her that…

"Aren't you working for Erudite?" Tris said nervously. I could see the worry on her face.

Now it was my turn to avoid her gaze. I glanced down to the ground sighing frustrated. I wish I could tell her…but that was in my contract to, absolute secrecy.

"Eric?" she asked again…she reached out and grabbed my hand.

I glanced up at her in shock as she placed her fingers in between mine. I felt a shiver run through my spine and butterflies were taking off in my stomach.

 _Butterflies? Did I really just think about butterflies?_

Her hand fit perfectly in mine as she tightened her grip on me, I did the same. In that moment I felt a pull between us, I wanted to do it. I had to…I started to learn up closer to her face while my eyes fell down to her lips. For a moment she just stayed and stared at me but quickly pulled away turning her face away from mine.

I backed off quickly, feeling the heat rush to my face. Rejections a bitch, "I'm…sorry."

"No it's- it's uh…" Tris said shrugging and swallowed a lump her throat, "okay…?"

She made that last part sounds like a question. She still didn't let go of my hand so I didn't let go of hers. We sat there for a few more painfully awkward minutes as I felt the burn from my embarrassment trying to think of something else to talk about. Finally Tris piped up.

"I'm worried about my parents," Tris expressed, "I know you don't understand…but they're good people."

"Why wouldn't I understand?" I asked her curiously trying to get past the awkwardness of it all.

"Well…" Tris replied sheepishly, "I mean I remember you telling me that you didn't exactly…"

"Yeah my pops sucked," I said, maybe if I opened up to her she'd do the same, "him and me never got along. He was never satisfied with the grades I got. My mom was alright though. I still miss her from time to time."

"Can I ask you something?" Tris asked after a few more moments of silence.

"Of course," I offered. She was resting her hand on her knee…I really wanted to reach out and hold it.

"Did you ever think that you wouldn't make it?" Tris asked still avoiding looking at my face, "Like when you were training?"

"Nah," I said honestly thinking back, "Dauntless saved my life."

"Really? How?" she asked with a childlike curiosity.

I grinned at her as I started remembering, "well…when I was eighteen almost out of high school, failing most of my classes, and getting into fights all the time…well that was when things were pretty shitty at my house."

Tris was now watching me intently.

"I have two older brothers and one younger," I told her, "the older two are prized Erudite minds and the younger brother from what I heard transferred to amity."

"Really?" Tris asked with a small grin.

"Yeah, I saw that coming a mile away though," I replied laughing at another memory, "I remember one time me and my younger brother we found this puppy in the street. It was super tiny, must've been abandoned by its mom. I always wanted a dog, and my little brother loved anything that breathed. So we took the puppy and hid it under my bed for weeks. Me and my brother took care of it and hide him for a long time until he got big enough that he went through and chewed up mostly everything that was in our house."

Tris smiled again.

"God our mom was so pissed at us," I said with what I realized was my first real smile in a while.

Tris smiled and got a dreamy look on her face, "you know I remember about a few weeks before my choosing ceremony, really early in the morning I climbed up the pipes to my house to get to the top."

"You mean those gray boxes you live in?" I teased her.

"Yes Eric," Tris laughed rolling her eyes.

I like the way my name sounded when she said it.

"I climbed up the gray box right before the sun rose because I hardly ever get to see the sun rise or set. I just wanted to see it one time."

"You wanna see the sun set now?" I said to her raising my pierced eye brow.

"I can see it right now," Tris said indicating to the window.

"I know," I said standing up, "but I mean do you really wanna see it?"

"What do you mean?" Tris asked now getting a nervous look on her face.

I held out my hand to her, "Come with me."

She sat there, with a growing worry on her face. She looked very torn.

"Today initiate," I said with my trade mark smirk.

She rolled her eyes at me and took my hand. I pulled her up and went out onto the balcony with her at my side and strategically stood in front of the sun.

"Close your eyes," I commanded.

"What?" she asked nervously.

"You heard me," I replied, "close em."

Tris still stood there silently.

"Can I ask you something now?" I decided to challenge her.

She glanced up at me, her eyes answering the question for her.

"Do you trust me?" I asked letting the question hang there.

It felt like an eternity of waiting while my shame was slowly resurfacing. Now I feared her answer.

"Aren't you working for Erudite?" Tris asked again quietly.

I stepped closer to her now, only a few inches away from her, "Tris…I'm not gonna let anything happen to you. I promise…"

"You know I'm not going to pass that final test," Tris murmured with a shaky breath.

"Why?" I asked her.

Now she looked up at me with tears in her eyes and whispered, "You know why."

Feeling braver than usual, I took her chin in a few of my fingers and leaded down so my forehead was against hers.

"Tris," I whispered to her staring straight into her glowing hazel eyes, "I promise you on my last dying breath that I'm not going to let anyone hurt you. I'm here for you…more than you know."

I stayed close to her face waiting for a reaction, she seemed to only stop breathing as her mouth opened. God I wanted to kiss her.

"Close your eyes," I whispered again.

This time she listened to me. with her eyes closed I grabbed her hands and led her over to the railing. There was a small gate that opened up out onto a small ledge only about foot wide. From there, the building ended with nothing but open space and a long fall down.

"Step up," I instructed still holding her hands as she raised her boot and stepped onto the ledge.

She began to wobble as light wind blew past us.

"Hold on," I said to her as she tried to take one step to many. I grabbed onto her hip quickly pulling her back while held onto her hand with my other. Her hand around mine tightened as she drew in a scared breath.

"It's ok," I said to her as I pulled her to the left so she could be directly in front of the sun set.

Once she was where I wanted her to be, I closed the gate. I put both my hands on gently on her hip and pulled her back so she was leaning against the gate. Now I stepped up on the ledge on the opposite side of the gate and peered over her shoulder. The sunset was perfect; I got her out here at the perfect time. It was just as the sky was fading from orange to pink to purple to blue. Even a few stars started to appear.

"Don't let me fall ok?" she murmured as the wind picked up again and she wobbled around nervously.

"I'll never let you fall," I whispered to her as I tightened my grip on her waist, "open your eyes."

When she did there was huge sigh of relief from her…and a smile worth a thousand stars in the sky.

"Eric…" she said breathlessly, "it's incredible."

I couldn't stop staring at her now, "Yeah…"

She turned to face me and seemed surprised at how close we were…but she didn't pull away this time. I felt the surge growing this time, and now I knew she could feel it too. We both just hovered there for a moment, knowing that on this surface this was wrong. I could feel her breathing on my lips…I had to, I couldn't resist it anymore. There was no denying it.

I leaned in and she met me for what little of half way there was. From the moment her soft lips met mine, I felt like someone had lit off a thousand shooting stars within me. I kissed her soft and sweetly, unsure of how much I should push it assuming that she really did live up to the abnegation reputation. Still I needed more, feeling her mouth on mine made my head feel like it was spinning and my heart was soaring. I wrapped my arms tighter around her waist as she placed her hands on top of mine. I felt her tongue graze against my lips making moan. I opened my mouth feeling daring as my tongue met hers and collided together perfectly.

There was definitely no denying it at this point. I needed her and I would do anything for her. Only it was Caleb who had given me and idea on how to help her…


	15. Chapter 15

The final test was two days away. I don't know who felt more nervous between Tris or I. I was already trying to think of a way to hide that she's a divergent. I figured she had to practice, but she had to practice in someone else fear landscapes. I only had two; I didn't think that'd be enough to train her to act like a dauntless. It sickened me at the idea I had in mind to help her, but I decided that I was going to do whatever I could to save her. Even if in the end it wasn't the right thing to do.

I had spent the night after we had kissed tossing and turning all night. My thoughts were entirely consumed by her as I tried to think of a way to save her. Each plan I made up seemed more unrealistic than the next. Jeanine had awarded me for turning in Jacob Arson with an email explaining a little more about what she was trying to do. She told me that she was looking for something…something that she believed that Abnegation had. The email wasn't much more descriptive than that… the more guns and gear that Erudite loaded into the secret halls of Dauntless the more I knew it wasn't going to be good. Jeanine was going to start a war, I could see that clearly. Dauntless were just going to act as her puppets to do the dirty work. It was that that spawned an idea of how I could save Tris. The more I thought about it the more I knew there would be only one way, but Tris wouldn't want it. I wasn't meant to be her hero…I never was but I had to try. I was in too deep with Erudite.

I knew who could be though. That was why, in the days before the final test, I managed to slip an note to two people, telling them to meet at the upper patio on the west side of Dauntless at noon today. I showed up ten minutes early, kneeling on the ground peering over a decayed hole in the wall. Down below, members of Erudite's were loading in crates of computers, supplies and a new serum they had designed.

Four showed up early too, I recognized the sound of his boots as headed towards the door, he looked shocked to see me, "What is it Eric?"

I signaled for him to be quiet and beckoned him to get down and come closer towards me.

"Why did you tell me to come?" Four asked when he perched down next to me and glanced through the hole in the wall.

"To show you this," I said pointing out towards the Erudite.

"I already know about that," Four replied eyeing me suspiciously, "why are you showing me now?"

"Because I need your help," I said trying to soften my tone a little bit…even if in a way I hated the guy.

"With what?" Four spat at me.

"Eric? Four? What are you two-," came a soft voice from behind us.

Like before I indicated for Tris to be quiet and come near us. She seemed to get the picture as she quickly kneeled down and came over.

"What's going on?" Tris asked looking from me to Four.

"I think I found a way to help you," I said looking to Tris and glanced at Four.

Tris started to stutter and looked nervously from me to Four, "wha- w-w- with what?"

"Tris it's ok," Four said reassuringly and started to reach for her shoulder but stopped when he noticed a growing tension on my face in response.

"What- what do you mean?" Tris asked now looking to me scared.

"Tris…" I said to her taking her hand and slightly enjoying the way Four rolled his eyes at me, "I told him."

"What?" she yelled loudly.

I quickly clapped my hand over her face and glanced through the hole praying no one heard.

"Tris it's ok…" Four said reassuringly, "I promise… I'm not going to let anything happen to you."

"Neither will I," I added in taking my hand off of her mouth.

Tris seemed to calm slightly but not much, "why did you bring us both here Eric?"

"You need to learn how to pass the test Dauntless style," I started to explain to the both of them really, "and you're not going to be able to do that with my fear landscapes."

With a heavy sigh I looked to Four, "we need to take her into your fear landscapes."

"No!" Four yelled back too loudly.

"Shh!" I exasperated to him, "do you wanna get us fucking caught?"

"Why can't I just go into your fear landscapes?" Tris replied just as hastily.

"Will both of you shut up and let me explain?" I said getting frustrated, I hated this plan but it was the best I had, "Tris…you need to learn how to respond like a Dauntless in a real fear landscape. Four and I both do it in different ways, if we both took you into his fear landscapes we could teach you how."

"No," Four said more calmly shaking his head.

"Do you wanna help her or not?" I asked.

"I'll take her into my fear landscapes and teach her," Four replied with a dead stare, "but not you."

"What?" I questioned him, "scared to let me see inside your head?"

"Why don't the three of us go into yours?" Four turned it on me.

I clenched my jaw, as my mind began spinning, "she won't learn anything useful mine. I don't know what yours are and honestly I don't give a fuck if you're scared of a fucking cat. This is about her."

"Why are you doing this anyways?" Four demanded and glanced back at Erudite, "Tris, he's working for Erudite. This could be a trap!"

"It's not," Tris replied and looked from him to me again, "he already told me he's working for Erudite and…I trust him."

I grinned deviously at Four

"Well I don't," Four said giving me the same cold stare as always, "what the hell are they doing down there."

"I can't tell you."

"Why not?"

"Because they'll kill me."

"Then maybe I should be the one protecting her and not you."

"If anyone's going to save her it's going to be me, I have an in with them I can find out what they're-,"

"Will both of you just stop!" Tris demanded in a high whisper, "Look I know you think that you both need to protect me but you should really both be focusing on teaching me how to protect myself."

I knew she was right… but Four was just being a pain in the ass.

"What do you want us to do?" Tris asked looking to me.

Four was now looking inquisitively at me.

"I can't be seen helping you after the test you took today," I started to explain, "from here on out Tris you're on your own. Dauntless and Erudite are both going to be there to watch your test and will scrutinize everything about it…if your too good they'll kill you and if you're too slow you'll die. I know how Four does things...he's good at teaching people how to manage their fear landscapes."

"Then why didn't you let me teach her how to all this week?" Four demanded.

"Because Jeanine told me to," I said bluntly.

Four's eyes got colder, there was something going on in his mind that he was burning to say… I could see it.

He turned and looked at Tris and then said, "Where's Jacob, Eric?"

Fuck…

Now Tris turned to me furrowing her eye brows.

"They caught him," I said quickly, not entirely a lie, "not me."

"Because you turned him in," Four accused.

"No I didn't," I lied…hating myself more and more, "I filled out the reports just like I always do and send them to Jeanine like I'm told to."

"What did you write about mine?" Tris asked with the expression.

"I may have exaggerated bit on yours," I said to her trying to look sincere.

"But not on Jacobs'?" Four asked tilting his head.

"Look," I said now speaking the truth, "just because I'm _a_ leader here, doesn't mean I'm that high up. If someone besides me catches… _them_ it's not always my fault."

Tris looked confused at hurt by my words.

"Tris you know that I'm trying to save you," I said taking her hands, "I mean it when I say that. But you have to understand…I'm going to have to do things that aren't going to be easy. But I have a way to help you."

"What's that?" Four asked.

"None of your business," I said with a growl, "that part is between me and her, if she wants to tell you she can."

"What is it?" Tris asked desperately.

"I'll tell you later," I promised rubbing the back of her hands with my thumb and turned to Four, "look I'll give you a key to a sim room…take Tris there tonight at midnight and run her through your fear landscapes until she gets it right."

I looked back to Tris who had an unreadable expression, "After you're done Tris…I want you to come over to my place."

"Hell no!" Four replied loudly.

"Dude shut the fuck up or you'll get us caught," I whispered to him dangerously low, "look it's not going to be like that. I just need her to come over so that we can talk."

"Then why don't I come with and the three of talk?" Four offered.

"Then the three of us can all go into your fear landscapes together," I said back with a sarcastic grin.

Four knew he was at a loss, he shook his head and breathed frustrated.

"If you're setting us up for a trap…" Four began to threaten.

"He's not," Tris replied with a disgusted look.

It made me feel slightly better knowing that she trust me…only slightly because I hated the idea of the two of them being alone in a sim room together.

"Look we don't have all day," I said impatiently as the members down in Erudite had finished unloading the last truck, "do you want to do this or not?"

Four look between Tris and I, obviously torn on what to do.

"Fine," Four agreed but turned darkly to me, "but if you're setting us up…and this is a trap-,"

"Yeah I know" I cut him off, "you'll hunt me down to the ends of the earth and kill me."

Four grimly nodded to the both of us and said to Tris, "meet me in the sim room at midnight."

With that he got up and left quietly through the door.

Tris now turned to me and placed her hand on my neck, "are you sure you want to do this?"

"Which part?" I asked her with a small grin as I leaned into her hand, "letting you be along in a room with Four or send you to practice in his fear landscapes."

"Well," Tris shrugged, "both really."

I moved closer to her and pulled her into a hug. She sighed with a sort of relief as she wrapped her around my neck and rested her head against my shoulder breathing on my neck. It started to send shivers down my spine.

"I trust you," I said honestly holding her in the hug, "in every way. I know you can pass this test…Four's a good teacher."

She kept her arms wrapped around my neck but pulled away and looked on my face. A mix of worry and hurt filled her face, "what are you planning Eric."

"I just need you to trust me babe," I whispered to her with what I was sure the same look of worry and sadness on my face.

She quickly pulled me into her as she started to kiss me just as passionately as before. Her mouth begged to enter mine as she ran her tongue along my bottom lip, I was open to oblige as I opened mine meeting her tongue desperately. Maybe I was wrong about these Abnegation girls. As she began to slow down she ran her hand along my neck and placed it on the side of my face.

"I've been thinking about that all day," she whispered.

I opened my eyes to see her face entirely flushed and red and a cheeky grin on her lips.

I chuckled, "you're cute…and that makes two of us babe."


	16. Chapter 16

I kept pacing around my apartment glancing at the clock on the wall, it was 12:39. How much fucking time did Four need with Tris? His fear landscapes couldn't be that complex could they? Then again, they needed to be otherwise Tris wasn't going to get anything out of it. Four better not fuck this up…or do anything with Tris.

I had done everything I could to keep myself busy after the final meeting with the other Dauntless leaders. I went down to the leadership gym and took out some frustrations on the punching bag, cleaned up my apartment for the first time in…awhile, took a shower, paced around my apartment staring at the clock. All the more I waited the more sure I was that this was a mistake.

 _Of course it was you asshole_ , a part of myself said to me, _It makes more sense for her to be with Four_. What the fuck was I thinking? Of course Four and her were better off, the two of them were clearly close. Tris has said that she knows things about Four which means they must spend time together. This was fucking stupid, I was fucking stupid.

I glanced up at the clock for the millionth time. 1:07. She's not coming. She'll never come for me, I was an Dauntless/Erudite agent hunting divergents. Four had probably managed to convince her that I was lying and couldn't be trusted…and that she should trust him instead. The thought made me sick and furious all at once. I hated him. I hated me. This was never-

My thought was interrupted by someone knocking on my door. I practically ran over to it and flung it open. She came, Tris was standing in my doorway. Her hair was falling casually into her face sexily again with a small grin on her face.

"Hey," she started to say quietly, "I finished up with-,"

I didn't want to hear his name. Not now, I didn't even wanna think about him. I grabbed her by her hand pulling her into my apartment. Slamming the door shut behind her I grabbed her face and pulled her to me. Generally I held back thinking that she was too Abnegation at heart. I knew they were strict about their physical contact with others and the last thing I wanted to do was push her away. However she was the one that kept pushing for more. A part of me figured that she wanted more and was just too shy to ask for it. I decided to test the waters to see how she'd react.

I pinned her up against the door taking her mouth by full force. I cupped her face while I wrapped my arm around her small waist holding her to me. She responded just how I hoped she would. Her tongue against mine fought passionately for dominance. She moaned as she wrapped her hands around my neck running one hand along the back of my neck. She arched her back pushing herself more onto me. As much as I wanted to keep fucking going with it…I didn't want to push her into something if she wasn't really ready.

I pulled my lips off of hers but rested my forehead on hers. We were both breathing heavy and with the pounding in my chest it felt like I had just ran around the whole Dauntless complex. I wanted her so fucking bad…

"Sorry…" I said breathlessly but unable to hide the smile on my face, "I've been thinking about that all day."

Tris giggled, "I've never seen you smile before."

Hearing her giggle had a certain effect on me that wasn't making holding back any easier. I still had one arm wrapped around her waist while I now had the other one stretched out against the door stabilizing my weak knees.

"I didn't mean to go quiet that…" I started to try to explain myself.

She reached up to the side of my face again, resting her thumb on her cheek, "Hey it's ok… it's just… this is all new to me. I don't wanna go to fast."

"That's fine," I comforted her hoping it'd work as I snaked my arm out from behind her, "I don't want to push."

"Thank you," she whispered and perched up to meet my lips kissing me softly again.

When she pulled away I said, "I just missed you…and the thought of you being alone with Four all night…"

"Nothing happened," Tris reassured.

"I know," I agreed with her, "I believe you…I'm just…"

"Jealous?" She said with a raised eye brow and a cheeky grin.

"Being that I get to be the one to pin you up against the door and kiss you like that? Not really…" I said returning the same grin to her, "Come in, I'd show you around but there's not much to see."

My apartment was really all just one big lofty room with. My Bed was off in the corner with a small kitchen a few feet away. On the other side of the loft were just a couch and some extra chairs. I didn't really spend much time here so I never really worried about what it looked like. The only thing that made it look like someone actually lived here was a small metal desk and the cork board above it.

That was the first place that Tris wandered over to. On it were a few pictures, one of me and Max when they offered me a leadership position, one of my graduating training class all lined up in three rows, a couple of my friends in leadership at bars and the tattoo parlor and then only one of all my family back when I was younger. I could tell that was where Tris's eyes stopped.

"Is that all your family?" Tris asked fascinated staring at the picture.

"Yeah," I said glumly as I turned to stare at the ground while she looked closer.

I remember that being the only picture we ever took as a family; my parents, my three brothers and I. We all had our hands behind out backs in our deep royal blue outfits, not even close to one another. All of us brothers looked the same, all square faces with the same dark, serious looking expression. We all got it from dear old dad who was the sternest looking out of all of us. The only one smiling in the picture was my mom, her soft blue eyes sparkling in her smile. me and Eli, the youngest of the two of us got the blue. Cole and Jed got the dark brown from dad.

"They all kind of look like you," Tris said with a small girn.

"Still the best looking one out of all of them," I said smugly.

"It's the tattoos and the piercings," she nodded with a smile.

She was being playful.

I instinctively ran my hand up my neck to one my tattoos and said, "you like them?"

"Yeah," Tris blushed, "when I was a kid and saw the dauntless running around with all their tattoos I always thought they look cool."

I grinned at her, admiring her face while she looked back at the corkboard. Along with the few pictures I had there were a few crayon drawings from the kids in Dauntless. Most of them were sloppy crayon drawings of me.

"You have little admirers," Tris noted looking up at me with a smirk.

I chuckled, "Yeah… I like hanging out with the dauntless kids. We always encourage them to be active; I usually hung out with them after school playing games with them and telling them to be brave and jump off things all the time. They always come back from school and give these to me."

"Hm," Tris said her smirk growing, "I didn't know you liked kids."

"Well to be fair," I said shrugging, "it's a lot easier when I can give them back to their parents when they're sick of me."

"Where are the kids?" Tris asked curiously now, "I never see any around here."

"This section of Dauntless is reserved for training and leadership," I started to explain to her, "We have village outside of the compound with houses and parks for the Dauntless families."

"Huh," Tris replied intrigued, "I didn't know that."

"C'mon," I said wandering over to the couch, "tell me how it went with Four."

Tris sighed and flopped down on the couch near me, "well… what Four said to me made sense. Trying to figure out things out the way a dauntless would, finding a way to survive…I'm just not sure if I can be good enough and then not good enough at the same time."

I slowly scooted closer to her and put my arm on the back of the couch around her, "I think you can figure it out."

"Do you really think so?" she said looking up to me and folded her arms inwardly.

"Yeah I do," I said placing my hand on her shoulder now, "shit when I saw you jump off that first train in those ugly gray clothes I was surprised that you jumped at all let alone first."

Tris shook her head, "I was terrified when I did that."

"But you did it," I replied, "you've impressed me every day since you got here. I think you're a lot more dauntless than you think you are."

"What's the thing that's impressed you the most?" Tris asked regaining some playfulness back.

"The fact that you pelted a fucking knife at my face," I laughed and looked at the scar on my hand.

"Oh my god!" Tris said when she saw my hand and jumped closer to me, she was nearly on my lap now.

It had mostly healed up but there was a clear cut line across my palm with still tender new fresh.

"I'm so sorry," Tris said holding my hand with both of hers. She slowly traced her fingers over the scar.

"You're abnegation is showing," I said with a smile.

Her's seemed to sink.

"It's ok, I kinda like it," I replied putting my other hand on top of hers, "no one's ever been this concerned about me before, especially for such a small wound."

"Small?" she said looking at the line closer, "It looks pretty big to me."

"I have worse scars," I shrugged, this little one on my palm was really nothing, "I'm just impressed that you actually threw it at my face."

"You told me to!" she said with an embarrassed smile.

"Yeah but I didn't think you'd actually do it," I laughed at her returning the smile, "but that's what I mean. You don't think you can do it and frankly in the beginning I never thought you could either. Except every time you have."

"Can I ask you something?" Tris said now getting a bit more serious.

"Anything," I replied.

"What's your fear landscapes?" she asked slowly with wide eyes.

I wanted to tell her…she knew Four's fears now. I wanted her to know mine. I just didn't know how to tell her… I took a deep breath trying to find the words.

"Eric," Tris said reaching up putting a hand on my neck, "it's ok…you can tell me. I want to know."

"I want to tell you," I replied sincerely, "I just don't know how."

Tris sat and waited patiently.

"I only have two really…" I said leaning back on the couch, "the first one is stupid and irrational…I'm terrified of…sharks."

"Sharks?" Tris laughed with a huge smile on her face as she laughed.

Had anyone else laughed at me I'd probably punch them out but seeing a smile that big on her face really made it worth it.

"But we don't even live by the ocean," Tris pointed out.

"I know," I said shaking my head, "but that's why it's stupid. Back in Erudite, they basically expect you to know everything about fucking everything and we had to do a study on an animal and do this whole stupid report on it in our sophomore year of high school. I got assigned sharks and had to read a bunch of books about them and look at all these pictures of them. I didn't even think I realize I was scared of sharks until I went in for my first mental test in my initiate days."

Tris looked at me with a cute amused look on her face.

"I was trapped in some small metal cage and just saw this giant as fucking shark charge at me an basically rip the cage apart to get to me," I said feeling the nerves growing my stomach, "my instructor actually pulled me out of my test because I couldn't handle it."

I hated myself that day. That was the first time in my training days that I absolutely failed something. The whole shark thing blindsided me, that was the one time I was terrified and had no idea what to do. I was a failure.

"Sounds like me with crows," Tris said rubbing my neck comfortingly.

I glanced at her and started laughing again, "You realize that you just proved my point again right?"

"What do you mean?" she replied.

I reached up and grazed my fingers on her collar bone where she had her bird tattoos, "you got your fear tattooed…I know for damn sure I'll never get a shark tattoo."

Tris laughed again, then looked at me with wonder and asked, "what's the second one?"

Now I turned away from her…feeling the shame growing again. This was the worst, the thought of this one haunted me every day. It consumed me in the darkest part of my mind. It wasn't something I liked to dwell on much even though I know it's there.

"It's ok you can tell me…" Tris whispered leaning into me.

"Being a failure…" I whispered back not daring to look at her.

"What?" she said barley above a whisper.

"You know what my dad said to me one year after my transfer when I ran into him one day out on the streets…" I started to say clenching my fist, "he said 'Eric…I'm glad you left to go to Dauntless. You'll do well there. You never really fit in with us, faction before blood is something we all must strive for and now seeing you as a Dauntless I feel like you found yourself… you are not my son anymore.'"

"That's disgusting," Tris replied wrapping both her arms around me.

"Even being here," I continued to tell her, "I always felt like being Dauntless was who I was really supposed to be…but in the back of my mind I feel like I will never be enough sometimes. I wasn't good enough for my perfect genius family; my parents didn't want my disgracing their name in Erudite. Four beat me in a fight that dropped me down three places in the ranking, I got pulled out of my first mental test by a fucking shark when we don't even live by the goddamn ocean, and I nearly didn't make it to my leadership position."

"Why did you almost not get it?" Tris asked surprised.

"Because they offered my position to Four first," I growled quietly clenching my fists even harder now.

Tris sighed and looked down to my fists. She took them both in her hands.

"Hey," she said to me forcing my hands open and laced her fingers in between mine, "you are the most amazing Dauntless I've ever met. You pushed all of us to be better…to be a better person, to be strong and brave. You taught us all how to be strong…you're what it really means to be Dauntless."

I let go of her hands as multiple unpleasant memories came flooding to my mind, "no I'm not."

I got up and went over to a large window overlooking the quiet city.

"Yes you are!" Tris tried to convince, "Everyone here loves you."

"They don't love me," I growled back aggressively keeping my back to her, "they all show me off like a fucking badge of honor because I bring in results."

I realized I had to tell her the truth about Jacob Arson. I had to tell her the truth about a lot of things.

"Tris…" I started to say leaning against the window, I didn't want to face her, "I need to tell you some things. That's why I wanted to bring you here."

She wrapped her arms around me from behind, "tell me."

"I lied to you earlier…" I started with, this was a lot easier to do when I didn't have to look her in the face, "I turned in Jacob…kind of."

"What do you mean kind of?" she asked.

Her ton was hard to read, "I…I just told Jeanine his name. I really don't know what happened to him though. Last I knew he went out for his run and just…never came back. But he wasn't as…divergent as you are. He might have not even been divergent at all. I turned him in…because I didn't want them to find out about you."

She dropped her arms from around me. _Here we go_ , I thought to myself. I wasn't going to lie to her about everything else I was had to do.

"Tris," I said quietly feeling my eyes water, "I'm working for Jeanine. She'll kill me if I quit or if I don't deliver what she wants. I'd lay down my life to save you in a heartbeat…I'm sure about that at least, but there's no way I can get out of working for her."

 _Don't be a coward_ , I turned around and faced her. There was sadness in her eyes. But mostly I couldn't tell what she was thinking.

"I want to keep working for Erudite," I sighed out heavily, "so I can try to keep them away from you as long as I can. Your brother Caleb, he shouldn't have told you about them throwing over Abnegation. That made me think that…well maybe I could get them to trust me. When they do…I'll find a way to get information to you to help you."

"Eric," Tris said her eyes widening, "if they find out you're doing that they'll kill you…or- or worse!"

"Tris I'm scared that I'm not good enough to save you," I said putting it out there, "I don't know how. This is the only thing I can think of. Four he can…he could probably protect you better than I can. I'm already in too deep with Erudite. They won't let me out of anything with them now."

"There has to be another way," Tris said now pacing anxiously, "What are they planning on making us do?"

"I don't know," I replied honestly, "they won't tell me until the day we do it… all I know is that they're going to be giving everyone a serum but I don't think it'll work on you."

Tris ran her hands through her hair and closed her eyes frustrated.

I reached out for her hips and pulled her to my casually, "There's something else you need to know."

"What?" She asked exasperated but wrapped her arms around me.

"If they find out about you," I started to say nervously, "they're gonna send me to come after you."

Her eyes were widening again nervously.

"You need to stay hidden and if they find out about you," I heaved hating my next words, "you need to stay away from me…"

"What?" she started to murmur, "no…no I can't- we can't-."

"Tris," I said trying to calm her, "I'm not… I'm not a hero type. Four probably has better odds at saving you than I do. At least this way you guys can have an in with Erudite. But if they find out about you, well they know I trained you. Odds are they might just kill me for that but if they don't they're going to send me after you."

"But you wouldn't-," Tris said nervously shaking her head.

"Of course not!" I cut her off promising her, "Even if they send me after you I can get them to trust me…I'll lead them off the trail."

Tris started to tear up again.

I cupped her face bringing hers to mine, "Tris…Erudite is close to me and if they find out that you're close to me… if anything happened to you because of me-."

"I'm not afraid!" Tris shouted back at me.

"Well I am!" I yelled back, "everyone here has been watching me like a hawk...you shouldn't be around me."

Tris backed away from me out of my arms and shook her head. She seemed torn within herself, "maybe I should go."

I'd rather have her throw another knife at my face than say that…but it was true. I could feel my heart sinking quickly.

"Okay…" I whispered hoping she wouldn't hear how much my voice was shaking, "I'll walk you back."

"No," Tris said shaking her head, "I can walk myself."

She headed towards the door as my heart was sinking lower and lower. I somewhat followed her to the door.

Before she opened the door she turned to me and said, "You know you always told me that being Dauntless was more than just being brave…it was about standing up for what you believe in and protecting those that others wouldn't. Looking at you now, you don't seem very Dauntless to me."

I'd rather have her stab me in the heart with a knife than say that to me. Either way it all felt the same as she slammed the door shut behind her as she left.


	17. Chapter 17

With Max and fellow Dauntless leaders gathered around me, we all stood in a large dome like room. In the center of the room was a glowing simulator chair, with Tor administering the tests today. Jeanine and some of her other Erudite members were also in the room on the other side. They were all messing with their computes, taking notes and observing everyone tests. I felt like shit and the scowl on my face made it obvious. I hated myself…I hated everything about myself right now.

"Next initiate," a member of Erudite called out, "Beatrice Prior."

I glanced towards the double doors and saw Tris enter with Four. Her eyes immediately connected with mine, but I tore away quickly since Max was right next to me.

"Not going to lie son," Max said with a chuckle, "I'm really surprised that that Abnegation girl made it this far."

"Yeah," I agreed monotone still avoiding looking at her entirely, "she's come a long way…"

"With one of the best leaders and teachers Dauntless has ever had, how could she not?" Max said with a grin, "You've done well son, I'm proud of you."

"Thanks," I mumbled and finally glanced over at Tris now that everyone was watching her.

Tori was standing over her injecting the serum into her neck. She looked sullen as her eyes fluttered close. Soon enough her hallucinations appeared on multiple screens around the room. Jeanine looked at her with a raised eye brow, she looked pissed. She was waiting for her to fail.

Just like before, Tris's hallucination started with her in an empty field being attacked by crows. Somewhere off in the distant a fire started on the dry grass of the field and she managed to get the birds away with the fire. The situation changed quickly from her nearly being burnt alive, to being trapped in the water tank again. She was doing great, better than some of the others in fact. The water tank was filling quickly…she tried to tap on the glass again. My heart seemed to skip a beat as she tapped on the glass, but luckily it didn't break. Like a Dauntless, she managed to get out of it.

The next hallucination that came up made my heart stop…it was me. Shit…

Tris and I were in my apartment, everyone in the room seemed to start glancing at me. I rolled my eyes and tried to look irritated but luckily enough I didn't have to try to hard. Four even shared the same expression as me.

God dammit Tris…

Her hallucination version of me walked up to her wrapping his arms around her and kissed her slowly. Was she scared of me? Tris stopped the other me as I tried to pull up her shirt. She kept telling me to stop only for me to push her down onto my bed. Four looked at me like he was ready to kill me…

"Looks like you got an admirer," Max said with a teasing smirk.

All I could do was fucking pray that no one took anything away from this.

With me pinning her down on the bed, I questioned if she was really Dauntless or not as I tried to have my way with her. She managed to kick and push me off of her as that hallucination thankfully ended. Her next one was Jeanine approaching her, prompting to kill her family. I part of me thought that she wasn't going to do it, this hallucination was in a way tricking her into thinking that the test was over. Thankfully and not soon enough Tris followed the order and shot her family but woke up out of the chair popping up nervously.

Was she really scared of me? She glanced over at me, looking flustered and got out of the chair being led away by Four clearly embarrassed. God I hope no one suspects anything…

Jeanine was over about 10 feet away from where Max and I stood and glanced up at me.

"Curious hallucination there huh Eric?" she asked me with a mellow menacing stare.

"Once a stiff always a stiff," I replied hoping she'd accept my answer.

"I think that the stiff might have a bit of crush on him," Max laughed.

Even Jeanine seemed amused by it with a small grin.

"She ain't my type," I said shaking my head, hoping they'd buy it.

Everyone seemed to as Tris's results were recorded and the next initiate was called into the room.

After all the tests were done…it was time for Erudite's real work to begin. I was anxious and nervous. However I refused to let it show. So I stood up on the stairs while all of Dauntless gathered in the pit below me.

"Alright listen up," I commanded while all their heads turned up to face me, I didn't have time to find Tris but I knew she was down there, "Before you leave tonight, I want you all in four lines. Everyone gets a tracking device. Don't ask questions, just a precaution."

The only good thing about being in leadership at this point was that I didn't get a tracker. They wouldn't be able to watch me or see what I do, other than Max and the others watching me themselves. I headed down the stairs and grabbed an injector gun, I saw Max's gaze follow me around the room and then drift past me. I followed his line of vision to Tris who stood there gazing from me to Max looking just as anxious as I felt. With a smirk and full single minded determination, I headed towards her.

"Congratulations," I said to her for receiving the tops scores from her test, "you should be first in line but I'll make it easy for you."

I quickly lifted the injector gun to her neck feeling Max's gaze penetrating me.

Tris flinched as the tracker was inserted and looked to me worried.

Oh the things I wish I could say to you right now…

"Hurts like a bitch huh?" I said to her while shifting my eyes over to Max behind us, I could tell she got the message, "Now you're really one of us."

"Eric," Tris whimpered, begging me with her eyes.

I stalked past her, purposefully running my hand across hers hoping that through the crowd of people no one would notice. I was playing with fire here. Once everyone had filed out of the room, everyone was sent to bed early. Max came up to me at the end of it all.

"Long day huh?" he said tossing the now empty injector gun into a box.

"Yeah," I agreed clearing off some of the table.

"So what's with that girl…" Max asked with a small smirk.

"Who?" I asked playing dumb.

"The stiff," Max replied plainly, "she into you or something?"

"Well she followed me around like a damn puppy dog asking for tips on how to be better all her training," I said trying to pull an irritated face, "fucking annoying really."

Max laughed, "Such a lady killer…well go to bed son. We got an early start tomorrow. Jeanine sent you some things she wants you to have by the way; I put them up in your apartment."

I nodded and headed up to my apartment with a heavy heart. Dauntless was eerily quiet tonight. No one stayed up partying or went to any of the bars tonight. Jeanine's first mission started tomorrow. Up in my apartment on my desk was all the things Jeanine sent me. A black leather jacket with blue detailing, on the lapel of it was the Dauntless and Erduite symbol. A few more articles of all black and blue clothing were included. Plus, I even had two new guns. One was a small pistol with intricate designs all on the handle and a gun strap to put on my belt with it. The other gun was big and powerful and completely lethal. Erudite had tested them out and they could pierce through any metals or concrete, the bullets themselves were filled with explosive qualities and wouldn't explode until you hit another button near the trigger. These guns were reserved for leaders only. I already had plans for this gun.

I went to bed, unable to sleep. I was worried about Tris, I knew the tracking device and the serum in it wouldn't work on her. I could only pray she was smart enough to figure it out tomorrow. I wish she as here with me, all I wanted was one night by myself with her. I'd probably never get it. In what seemed all too soon it was time for me to meet the other leaders down in the pit. The trackers would start in about an hour. In that time I got up, had breakfast with the other leaders and headed down to the pit.

The sound of slow pounding feet moving methodically approached us. In an ordly fashion they all filed in with blank expressions. It was disturbing to see them like this.

"They can see and hear us," Max began to explain to a select few of other Dauntless leaders who were lucky enough to not get a tracker, "but they just don't process it the same way. The command's come in to be transferred."

I had never stood in a room with so many people and felt so alone. One by one I saw people from the initiate class all file in down the stairs. Tris appeared behind Christina…with the same blank expression marching mindlessly. They made it to the bottom of the stairs and stopped near the tables where all their guns laid. However something else caught my attention.

One guy came stumbling out of the line looking confused, "What's going on? What are we doing?"

Shit…

"Divergent," Max explained simply, "Eric…you wanna go take care of that?"

I sighed, feeling disgusted with myself already. I walked up to him placing my hand on the new pistol that Jeanine had provided and trying to sound soothing, "Hey man, everything's fine. Nothing to worry about."

I pulled the gun out, clocked it and placed the bullet cleanly between his eyes. The bang was unusually loud in the quiet room of so many people. It jumped off the walls echoing through the cavern. My heart sank and my stomach churned as his body fell to the floor in a head…I was a murderer. However a selfish part of me was only worried about Tris. I noticed her eyes widen out of the corner of mine as she grabbed a gun off the table along with everyone else.

Once all of the mindless Dauntless had gotten their guns we all made out way out to the trains. Each leader was assigned to a compartment to keep an eye out for anything unusual. I strategically managed to follow where Tris ended up and got the one with her in it. I climbed into the train scanning through the crowd. I found Four. He shared the same mindless look like the rest of them….and yet I wondered about him. My eyes connected with Tris's I saw the discontent in her eyes. I started thinking that she hated me for having to kill that man before. I grimaced and turned my back to all of them.

The only sound in the pack compartment was the sound of the train rolling along the track. With every second that passed I dreaded everything more and more. I knew what the mission was…I kept trying to piece together a plan in mind. But there was no way to plan this. The one thing I didn't plan for was for Tris to move up towards me.

I didn't dare look over at her…but I could see out of the corner of my eye she was standing right next to me and glanced at me. She turned back forward staring blankly. She was being incredibly stupid. All the Dauntless behind us may not be able to understand seeing her move around when she shouldn't but Erudite could. She was being incredibly reckless…which is why I didn't feel bad when I chose to be equally reckless by grabbing her hand and lacing her fingers with mine.


	18. Chapter 18

All together we started marching towards Abnegation. Tris was next to me trying to look mindless and last I saw Four he was a few feet behind us. It was early morning, no one would really be awake yet. All I could think of was how Abnegation was in for a rude awakening. I knew that Tris was going to go look for her parents. For now the only plan I could conjure up would be to help her find them and send them off to hide somewhere in the city.

As we made it to the gray boxes of Abnegation's villiage, the Dauntless began pounding on their doors. Some just went straight in and started pulling people out. The Abnegation naturally surrendered, but fear and tension was running rampant. The Dauntless were dragging some of them out of their houses by their hair and clothes, including all their kids. I could already see this was going to go south quickly. Soon enough, screams, people running and a few gun shots here and there were filling the morning.

I could tell it was breaking Tris's heart to see all this.

"I need to find my parents," she murmured quietly next to me.

"Just keep moving," I said briskly trying not to move my lips much or look at her, "where's your house?"

I followed Tris through all the houses until we stopped outside one. Tris glanced around nervously, so did I. No one important was watching us, I must've finally shaken Max off of me as he was patrolling elsewhere. We quickly entered the house and as I started to close the door, someone else opened it and followed us in.

"Four?" I said surprised, so I was right about him all along, "what are you doing here?"

"Mom? Dad?" Tris called out heading up the stairs of the plain house.

"What's the plan Eric?" Four demanded anxiously, hands gripping his gun intensely.

"Find Tris's parents and send them into the city to hide," I explained hastily.

"That's it?" Four asked, "What about everyone else?"

"You and I both know we can't save everybody," I said as a round of gun shots were fired outside, "I'm only here for Tris."

Four shook his head with a disgusted look and whispered so Tris wouldn't hear, "you haven't changed one bit."

Tris came running back down the stairs looking terrified, "They're not here."

"Where would they have gone?" Four asked quickly glancing out the window.

"I don't know," Tris exclaimed.

I walked over to her gripping her arm, "Hey, it's ok we'll find them. C'mon we gotta go."

We all turned and headed for the door but I held onto Tris's arm once more and turned her to me.

"Remember what I said before?" I pressed upon her, "About staying away from me…"

"Eric," she said shaking her head.

"Do whatever you have to do," I ordered her, "no matter what."

"Eric I can't," she replied breathlessly.

Four stood near the door clenching his jaw.

"Yes you can," I encouraged, "I mean you threw a knife at my face I'm sure you could do it again."

Tris smiled, "you're never going to let me forget that are you?"

I shook my head no with the same small smile but quickly replaced it with a grimace as we headed out the door. As if, right on que Max was heading right towards us.

"Have you found Natalie and Andrew Prior?" he asked sternly, "Jeanine wants to make sure we find them."

"They're not here," I explained as Tris and Four marched onto the next house.

"Let's go find out where they're hiding," Max replied and looked down the way towards Four and Tris, "with them."

"Them? You wanna follow them around?" I asked as we both headed off. There was no way they could run away now, that'd be obvious. But I didn't want Max and I trailing along with them either.

Still, I followed Max up to Four and Tris who ended up having to stop as a group of Abnegation were being lead over to one area where they were all being gathered.

"The legendary Four," Max said walking around to face him.

Both Tris and Four's faces were hard as statutes.

"Now a mindless drone," Max continued with a curious look in his eyes, "you were first in your class…better then Eric in some ways even."

I casted my hard gaze down to the ground, feeling a competitive rage growing.

"Now you're nothing," I added on noticing the way Max was treating me. Was he beginning to mistrust me? Things felt different between us now…and I needed him to trust me.

The contempt on my face must've been showing because now Max turned to me.

"You think he might be…?" He questioned me, "You were trained with him."

I walked to face Four, still staring mindlessly.

"No," I replied and tried to get him to follow me, "c'mon let's go."

"I guess there's only one way to find out," Max said raising his gun to Four head, "Say goodbye Four."

"You're really going to shoot him?" I asked with a sarcastic tone praying he'd drop it.

"What does it matter?" Max said callously, "We don't need him…we got you."

Max clocked the gun while I was internally fighting myself. Would I really stop the murder of Four all because I knew Tris might never forgive me for it. There was a lot at stake in this one moment but Tris acted first.

"Goodbye," Tris said quickly after Max has clocked the gun and pointed it at her.

"Move you are die," Four demanded pulling out his gun and pointed it at me.

Instinctively I pulled mine out and had no choice but to aim it at Tris. I had to play the part.

"Shit!" I said with a twisted smile on my face, "The stiff?"

"Apparently you missed something Eric," Max said sternly giving me a cold gaze.

"Two stiffs," I said turning my gun to Eric. Meanwhile Tris turned hers to me, "Two dead stiffs."

"We can't let a single divergent slip through," Max said coldly looking between all of us, "this is what happens."

"And I thought that it was just because you were a true dauntless at heart," I said looking towards Tris but trying to keep my eyes soft hoping she'd notice, "but really…you were just a monster all along."

"Why didn't you catch them?" Max said raising his voice to me.

"Guess that just proves what a danger she is to everyone," I said not taking my eyes off of hers.

She looked unsure.

"She's not going to shoot me," I said when in fact I was ordering her to.

"I think you might be over estimating my character," Tris replied understandingly. She lowered her gun and hesitated for a second only to glance back up at me with watered eyes as if to say…sorry.

She took a shot that landed right above my knee. I could feel it pierce through me easily as I fell over growling in pain.

"Run!" Four demanded as her and Tris took off.

I laid on the ground, growling through the pain. I applied pressure to the bullet hole as blood started seeping through. I remained hopeful that Tris would get away. Taking a shot to the leg would be nothing if she could just get away.

"Hey!" Max called out, "We need a medic on Eric now!"

Max took off after Tris and Four while a Dauntless medic waiting in the trucks came up to me. She was carrying a small plastic box and quickly flung it open and kneeled down next to me.

"Here," she said holding up a vile of yellow liquid to me.

I had to be mad, "what is this piss?"

"No," she replied rolling her eyes at me, "it's a healing serum. Erudite design, it'll completely heal up that gunshot wound and close it in about ten minutes."

Ten minutes? I quickly downed the disgusting serum and threw the vile down violently. She pulled me over leaning me against the wall and told me to stay put while she went back to the truck carrying the other medics to go find someone else to help.

The ten minutes were torture, they knew about Tris now. Here I was stuck on the ground with a fucking bullet in my leg and I couldn't even help her. I couldn't wait the whole ten minutes. After about six or seven the pain had subsided. I could tell the serum was working, but I didn't have that much time. I got up feeling my leg react painfully. I did my best to ignore the pain and kept running though the houses.

As I got to the edge of the Abnegation Village I saw her. Tris…

My heart soared as I saw her and someone else running across the empty field. The other woman she was with looked older in her gray dress. She had similar long wavy hair streaking behind her as they ran. That must be her mom, where did she get a gun?

Tris was with her mom, I was happy for her. however she was heading into the city and Max had saw them.

"Eric!" he called out to me.

I whipped around to see him jumping onto the truck.

"Tris and her mother are heading into the city," Max explained, "if we hurry we can cut them off."

I nodded and jumped up onto the truck feeling another painful twinge in my leg. I leaned against the sides of the truck as I applied pressure to it. The wound was closed, but I was still bloody and could see a scar where the bullet had been. All I could do was hold the pressure and breathe through it.

As we entered the city, there were shots going off in what seemed like every street. Things were falling apart quickly, I had to find Tris.

"Alright!" I called hopping out of the truck and looked to the Dauntless, "I want everyone to start sweeping the streets, if anyone finds Beatrice Prior and her mom bring em to me!"

Max grinned at me and nodded as I started to take initiative. I started running down the streets, praying no one else would find them before I did. I scanned down every alley way knowing that's where Tris would stick to over the main streets. As I started running down the street towards another ally I collided with someone else.

The impact against my leg shot another wave of pain as I heard a woman screaming.

"Beatrice run!" she said and raised her gun up to me.

I held up hands up glancing over my shoulder quickly to make sure no one was watching as Tris started screaming.

"No!" she screamed and pulled her mom's arm down, "Mom! Stop! He's with me."

"Beatrice he's a Dauntless!" she yelled nervously, "And by the looks of it he's a leader at that."

"Mom he's with me! Just trust me please!" She begged holding onto her arm.

Tris's mom Natalie glanced at me but then smiled and nodded at me.

"Very well," she said breathlessly, "nice to meet you."

Ah Abnegation never fails as nodded to her.

"C'mon we gotta go," I said hearing a dauntless truck coming up the way.

Together the three of us ran down another ally with me in the lead. Before we ran out into the street I glanced down it, surly enough there was a dauntless truck rolling pass but with only about six or seven dauntless. That would be easy to handle.

"There's about six of seven out there," I said turning to them, "but they can't see me with you two."

"I'll go," Natalie said starting to walk forward.

"No!" Tris said grabbing her arm, "I will."

"Be careful," I implored as she prepared to walk out onto the street.

"I'll cover you," Natalie said following closely behind her and then looked up to me, "and you-,"

"Right behind you," I nodded. I knew that I would have to kill all those Dauntless out there. I couldn't let anyone see me with them and let them live.

Tris walked out raising her gun and taking a few shots as they came raining back down on her. Natalie followed as the two ran for the next ally over. They kept their eyes down to the truck…but there was someone behind them coming up on them.

Will, and few others with their guns raised at them.

"Tris!" I yelled out and started shooting at the men at the truck.

If they noticed who I was they didn't have time to do anything about it, I took all of them out quickly and turned to Tris.

"Will! Will it's me!" she called out backing away from him.

But Will was gone, he was heading towards her mindlessly preparing to shot.

"Will!" Tris called out, I could see the pain in her face, she didn't want to kill him.

And I didn't want her to be like me…to be a murderer but that's why I was here.

I took a shot straight for Will's head. I could see the shock spread over Tris's face quickly as she watched her friend die at my hand. I felt a wave of guilt crash down on my when I saw her face. However I didn't have time to do anything about it. As Tris stood there shocked looking at Will's dead body, I saw more Dauntless sneaking up behind them coming from the truck. They were aiming for Natalie.

"Natalie! Look out!" I said impulsively.

Damn the Dauntless who saw me run up to her. I quickly wrapped my arms around Natalie as the Dauntless opened fire. A siege of bullets pierced into my back. Everything went quiet…I could hear far off screaming and muffled gun shots. My face collided with the hard graveled ground. I was drowning, I couldn't breathe. The bullets must have lodged into my lungs, now I was bleeding internally. Things were fading fast.

"Tris…" I murmured as I tried to get up…but my arms were going numb. I couldn't move or breathe or think.

My vision was going blurry as someone rolled me over. I felt an arm wrap around my back which felt like a steaming fountain of blood. Someone was calling my name…but far away. Maybe Tris left…

"Eric…" it said barley more than a whisper, "Eric…Eric!"

Things were getting slightly more clear as my eyes fluttered open. The pain was intense, I felt like screaming in hopes that it would be alleviate in some way but my voice wasn't working. All I could see was a gray sky above me and…her

"Tris," I said feeling a smile break out. She was here, with me.

Her face was stained with tears as she held onto me.

"Eric!," Tris cried, her mother was standing over her crying too, "you…you saved my mom."

"You're abnegation is showing Nat," I said up to her with a laugh.

My head was getting fuzzy.

"Honey we have to go!" Natalie said imploringly, "There's more of them coming, they'll pick him up and help him."

"I can't! I can't leave him!" Tris cried out holding me.

Help me with what? Oh yeah…I just got shot. I laughed.

"He's delirious," Tris said looking up to her mom, "we need to help him."

Even though I was laughing, the seriousness of everything was flooding back.

With all the strength I had, I reached up to Tris placing my hand on her face and whispered, "You have to go…I'll be ok. I promise."

"Eric-," Tris started to argue.

I could hear shouting and footsteps heading towards us quickly.

"Go," I tried to breathe out, I was choking again, my lungs were collapsing painfully, "I'll be fine just go…please."

"Honey," Natalie pressed, "come on."

Tris kissed my forehead and held me before she left. She bent down to my ear and whispered, "I love you."

I laughed again, "fuckin' awesome."

Tris loved me…damn I was a lucky son of a bitch. Last think I knew I was laying alone in that ally with all Dauntless gathered around me putting me on a stretcher.


	19. Chapter 19

**Alright guys...it's the final chapter.**

 **Thanks for all of the favorites and follows! You guys are the best!**

 **Look out for the next fanficiton, sequel to this one in the works...**

Her soft hands were slowly tracing my jaw line. I had her wrapped around me like silk. Her head rested on my chest while I ran my fingers up her waist. The serenity of the moment was perfect. Everything I ever wanted was now laying on top of me. I had never felt more secured, relaxed and loved as I did right now. Slowly though, things seemed to fade away like a dream. My chest was getting colder and felt more hallow. In fact, there was a piercing pain coming from my back.

My eyes fluttered over to see nothing but a dark concrete ceiling above me. I tried looking around and saw an IV and a few other tubes in my arm. I couldn't move much and my head was still fuzzy. My shirt was gone, instead now wrapped with gauze around me. But what concerned me the most…was something in the dead venter of my chest. A small metal ball was implanted in my chest, from it was small wires that looked like they were under my skin that were connected to smaller metal balls all around it. I tried grabbing at it to see if I could get it out…but it sent a lightning bolt shock through my heart that almost made it feel like it had made it stop for a moment. My fingers were shaking and going numb from a strange shocking sensation running through my like a wild current. I knew at once what it was, my father had designed it. It was meant as a torture device to get information out of people except no one except high up Erudite officials knew about it. It was one of their secret inventions saved for their purposes only. It had a tracking device, and electric wiring that could shoot the same amount of electricity as a bolt of lightning through my whole body. Erudite had implanted as quick and easy killing device directly into my heart.

I tried sitting up, growling as pain shot through my back. I scooted up so I could sit and looked around me. I knew I was in Dauntless, I recognized the main entrance, but off through a large opening in the wall was a white clean room. I saw many blue coats and dresses all with their backs to me. A familiar short blond haired woman stood in front of a monitor watching it intently. I noticed another familiar person in the lab. He had broad shoulders and same dark blonde hair properly cut in place. His big hands were messing with the screen in front of him as he looked over some notes in his hands. It was my brother Jed. This was the room that the Erudite had been hauling stuff into Dauntless for weeks.

I looked around in the front entrance…and saw Four. How the hell did he wind up here? He was sitting in a chair with all sorts of wires hooked up to him there were a few monitors next to him too, all displaying what he was seeing. Had Erudite managed to get into his head even though he's Divergent?

I started panicking thinking that Tris may have been caught, if she was she' wasn't here. But I was damn near ready to start tearing apart Dauntless piece by piece if she was here. However I didn't have to…she slipped right through the door her hand griped on a gun. Her eyes widened she saw me. She took a step towards me but I shook my head no, and indicated towards the Erudite lab.

There was something wrong; I could see it in her eyes. Her pony tail was falling out and she looked exhausted. Her eyes tore from mine over to Four. She looked probably just as shocked as I did to see him. She glanced from me to him for a moment and then quietly headed over to him. On the monitors I could see Tris approaching him from his point of view. I wanted to tell her to stop…but the Erudite still hadn't even glanced over their shoulder to notice that I was awake or that Tris was here.

She was muttering quietly to him. I couldn't really hear it, but I did notice her pulling a knife from her hip and started sawing off the straps on his wrists. He quickly reacted, pushing the knife out of her hands and up against one of the pillars. I started grabbing at the IV's in my arm but stopped when I noticed that the Erudite's attention had been caught, including Jeanine's. I leaned back onto the bed closing my eyes…I needed to keep myself a secret as long as I could.

"Four," Tris started to say desperately, "it's me…it's me you're in a sim."

"He can't hear you," Jeanine's calm controlling voice came in. Her stupid high heels clanked on the floor as she walked, "Amazing isn't it? Everything we think of that makes up a person, thoughts, emotions, history…all wiped away by chemistry."

I opened my eyes, luckily no one was watching me. I started pulling the IV's out of my arm. There was a table nearby that had my two guns, a bloody shirt and my jacket. I reached for my pistol.

"Four," Tris tried again.

He was staring grimly at Tris…he was going to attack her. I was going to kill him if I had to. Tris may hate me…but I would strangle the life out of Four with my bare hands before I let him hurt her.

"He's gone," Jeanine said standing behind him, "and we're all safer for it."

"Safer?" Tris demanded, "How are we safer?"

"The brilliance of the faction system is that conformity to the faction removes the threat of anyone exercising their independent will," Jeanine explained, "Divergents threaten that system."

As quietly as I could, I pulled the blanket out from over me and got out of the bed. However the movement, caught someone's attention.

Like looking in a mirror at my brother he looked up at me, his equally broad face gazed at me in surprise. He looked like he was about to open his mouth to say something but I raised a finger up to mine, indicating for him to shut the fuck up.

"Don't get me wrong," Jeanine's voice came as I quickly ducked behind the bed where no one would see me, "There's a certain beauty in your resistance, your defiance of categorization. But it's a beauty we can't afford."

I could hear Jeanine's heels heading back to the main lab followed by many of the other Erudite's. I slowly stood up with my pistol in my hand and snuck over behind one of the pillars closer to Tris and Four. From the pillar I saw Jed move over to a tablet that must be controlling Four.

"Four," Tris said walking up to him, "it's me…Four it's me."

Jed pushed a few more buttons on the tablet and Four charged at Tris slamming her by her throat into a nearby pillar. The two of them grunted as he started throwing her around. I ran up to Jed putting the gun at his throat.

"Make him stop," I said trying to be quiet to not attract attention.

He glanced over at his shoulder and jumped when he was me, "What are you doing?"

"Make him stop, now!" I said a little more forcefully.

"I can't," Jed said with a nervous look in his eye, "they'll- they'll…they'll kill me."

"And I'll kill you if you don't," I growled clocking the gun.

"What?" Jed said flabbergasted, "kill your own brother?"

"Faction before blood," I muttered.

Tris was struggling; Four was too much bigger and stronger than her as he threw her to the ground harshly.

"You wouldn't," Jed said staring at me with a face that I could tell meant he was unsure.

"I don't like faction before blood anymore than you do," I said now lowering my gun a little bit, "Please…please just help me."

"Why is this so important to you?" Jed asked.

I looked over my shoulder. Four punched her hard in the jaw sending her hurling towards the ground. She was loosing… Tris crawled on the floor and grabbed her gun near the chair and lifted it to Four.

"Four!" she yelled, "Stop."

Four stood over her looking down on her with the same dark cold face. Tris held the gun up to him but her hands were shaking. A few of the Erudite in the lab were now looking in on them. Some even noticed me holding a gun to my brother and stared at me in disbelief, no turning back now. What Tris did next made me feel like I was shot all over again.

Tris turned the gun around pointing it to herself. Four took in immediately kneeling down over her.

"Tris!" I screamed," No!"

I ran up behind Four pressing my pistol into her neck and put my finger on the trigger.

"No! Eric!" Tris yelled looking up at me, "Don't!"

Tris was crying now she switched her gaze from me to Four.

"It's ok Four," she whispered, "It's ok...it's me, it's me."

Four started to turn his head. He was breathing and sweating madly. I wanted to shoot him, a part of me wish that I would. But I doing so I knew Tris was never forgive me…but I was prepared to if I had to.

"Eric?" Jeanine called from the lab looking at me.

I glanced up at her…her mouth was open in shock and her eye brows were raised. So was Jed's. the tension and silence in the room could be cut with a knife. Everyone was staring at me as if I had lost my mind. No one could believe the truth of the moment so no one did anything.

Four started to turn his head away from Tris.

"Hey…" she said reaching up and grabbing his face, "it's me…look at me."

She managed to get Four to look at her again as she whispered, "it's me…it's me."

He was still panting and under his breath I could hear him whisper, "Tris…"

A wave of relief spread over Tris's face…did she love him? I was sure I shared a similar look of shock as the others. I glanced around…there were six Erudite men gathered next to us each with two guns pointed as each of us.

Four turned his head slightly and glanced up at me from the corner of his eye.

In a flash I turned my gun on the two pointing at me and killed them, Four did the same; we went down the line together killing all six of them. In the lab people were scrambling now. Together, Four, Tris and I headed towards the lab, taking out more Erudite as we went along. Tris pulled another knife from her waist band stabbing people in their arms or legs to get them to go down.

Someone was coming up behind four; I managed to take him out before he got to him. Four glanced up at me in thanks but soon raised his gun. For a second, I thought he was going to shoot me but the bullet whizzed past me towards someone behind me as he fell to the floor.

"Damn," I said with a small laugh in the moment, "we make a pretty good fucking team."

"Top two initiates in our class," Four said with the same amused look, "of course we do."

Jeanine was up at the main monitor clicking away on it frantically. Tris and I both looked at each other in the moment as she held the knife in hand.

"Aim left!" I shouted to her as she raised the knife and threw it.

It landed straight through Jeanine's hand and through the monitor.

A few more lone Erudite came wandering in, charging at Tris. Four and I managed to keep them at bay. Meanwhile up at the monitor Tris was demanding for Jeanine to shut it down. Up on the monitors there was a live feed of a Dauntless soldiers killing a few Abnegation. Tris pulled the knife from Jeanine's hand, placing it at her throat.

'I'm not going to ask you again do it!" She demanded, "Shut it down."

"I admire you're willing to die for what you believe in," Jeanine said with her typical calm controlled voice, "but so am I…you can't do it can you?"

There were no more Erudite's coming for us. Four and I stood there… Should I shoot Jeanine? No… those repercussions would be too much.

Tris glanced over at my then down at my feet.

Following her gaze, there was vile of the serum and an injector gun. I picked up quickly and loaded it.

"Maybe you're not quite as Dauntless as you thought you were," Jeanine said snidely then turned to me, "as for you…you're going to be wishing you were-,"

"Shut up," I said like a moody teenager, God I was tired of hearing her obnoxious voice as I tossed the injector gun to Tris.

"You're right…" Tris agreed to Jeanine, "I'm not…I'm divergent."

She sunk the injector gun into Jeanine's neck and slowly stated, "Now shut it down…and wipe the program."

On command the same mindless look grew over Jeanine's face while she used her good hand and turned the program off on the monitor. All the others were black as the system shut off.

Tris sighed and walked over to me…she glanced up at me with a relieved expression. I raised my hand up to her, pressing a few strands of hair behind her ear and rested my hand on her face.

Jeanine started panicking and tried to get the monitors to come back to life.

"Don't get me wrong," I told her sarcastically as I wrapped my arm around Tris's waist, "there's a certain beauty to your existence."

Jeanine, furiously grabbed an empty injector gun and ran at me with the needle. I grabbed onto her wrist…she was surprising strong for an Eruidte. I didn't have to fight her off long when something large connected with the side of her head making a loud clang. Jeanine fell limp to the floor as I looked over, it was Jed holding the bigger gun Jeanine had gotten me. he had hit her with the opposite end, the metal part of the handle.

"You're using it the wrong way bro," I said to him as he nervously handed it back to me as if waiting for it to explode.

"Bro?" Four and Tris said in unison.

I glanced at the still working monitors that were the security cameras outside the main doors. I saw Max and a few of the dauntless leaders charging towards us.

"You guys gotta go," I said quickly shoving them towards the back enterance, "Jed, lock the doors! We need to stall them."

Jed stood there dumbfounded, glancing at the security system.

"Now!" I yelled at him.

Hastily he made his way over to the system enacting a bunch of codes making the extra lock on the doors kick in. with that it would give us a few extra minutes before Max and the others would manage to get in.

"Eric!" Tris called out, "Come with us."

"I can't," I said to her, "Tris… I can't."

"Why?" she asked frantically.

I unzipped the jacket…showing them the device in the middle of my chest. Now even Jed looked up at me.

"Oh my god…" Jed said his face dropping, "Eric…they didn't…"

"What the hell is that thing?" Four demanded.

"It's a toutrure device," I explained feeling tears forming in my eyes, "it's-it's wired into my heart. It'll electrocute my heart until it kills me if Erudite wants it too."

Tris whimpered as her hands flew up to her mouth. I grabbed her and wrapped my arms around her waist. I placed one hand on the back of her neck holding her as tightly as I could as she cried into my shoulder.

"Tris…" I whispered in her ear, "I love you too…go with Four, I have to stay here."

She lifted her head up to look at me. Her face was damp as she looked miserably up at me. I wiped some of the tears off her face.

"I can get an in with these people," I started to explain, "I'll keep them from you as long as I can but you have to stay away from me from now on! If you ever see me you have to run! Run away from me as fast as you can."

"Eric…" she said barley audible, she seemed to by choking on her own sobs.

"I'm not you're hero Tris," I said letting her go and taking a step back, "I'm a fucking prick…Four can tell you all about it."

By the way he was rolling his eyes I knew he agreed with me…but his eyes kept glancing down a the device in my chest.

"I can stay here," I continued, "so that I can try to keep them from you…so I can protect you from me. I'll find a way to get whatever information to you that I can…just go."

Max and his team were clawing at the door now; Jeanine was still limp on the floor.

"Jed!" I called to him, he was still working frantically at the computer, "Do you have any of that memory serum?"

"Yeah," Jed nodded opening up a drawer and pulling out a small familiar purple vile.

"Tris! Four!" I yelled to them as Max was getting closer to opening the door, "Go!"

Tris shook her head in anguish. It killed me to see her this way.

"C'mon," Four said grabbing her arm and started pulling her away.

She tore her wet eyes away from me as her and Four ran through the door. All I wanted was to follow them. For the first time… I wished I was Four. I would take Tris to the nearest train, cross the wall and run away with her taking her as far away as I possibly could. Instead here I was with a one way ticket to death wired into my heart…and my fucking bother that I haven't seen in five years.

"Here," Jed said tossing me that purple vile with the serum, "by the way…it's nice to see you again."

I took it, loading it into the injector gun. Jeanine was starting to stir. I walked over to her, lifting up her head.

"Get all the surveillance footage from inside this room," I demanded of Jed, "erase all of it."

Jed nodded, "one condition."

I glanced up at him with a grimaced look.

"You need to protect me," Jed demanded with an equally menacing grimace.

Is that what I really looked like when I grimaced? Either way I nodded my agreement to him.

Jeanine's eyes fluttered opened and went icy cold as she saw me.

"You…" she muttered with a look that could kill.

"Yeah…" I muttered, "me…you can look at me like that for the rest of my life. Like a monster…because I am."

I sunk the injector gun into her neck, she gasped in surprise as I sunk the serum into her.

"I saved your life," I said sternly.

"You saved me," she repeated slowly.

"Tris and Four got away," I added.

"Tris and Four got away…" Jeanine stumbled over her words.

"Tris and Four are not divergents," I stated boldly.

"That won't work," Jed said walking up to us, "that serum's not powerful enough. You can plant an idea in her head…but really it'll only erase the last hour or so of her memory. She'll remember if you try to plant an idea that big in her mind."

I looked back down to here; she was still groggy as I asked her, "Who saved you?"

"Eric," she replied numbly.

"Who do you owe your life to?" I continued.

"You," she replied coming more to it.

"Who do you trust the most out of all the Dauntless leaders that work for you?"

"Eric…" she said as she shook her head and blinked a lot. She seemed to register for the first time that I was right in front of her, "Eric? What- what happened?"

"Divergents," I said simply as she started looking around the destroyed lab and numerous dead Erudite's. I glanced up at Jed who stood over us sternly.

The larger metal doors out in the entrance were thrown open. Max and the other Dauntless came crashing in. I zipped up my jacket quickly, hiding the device in my chest.

"What the hell happened here?" Max demanded looking around at everyone.

"Eric…" Jeanine said as if she were still confused, "he…he saved me."

Max beamed at me happily.

I smiled back when really inside…in my heart, I was slowly dying. I was going to die…if Tris would live it would all be worth it.

 **Alright guys...it's the final chapter.**

 **Thanks for all of the favorites and follows! You guys are the best!**

 **Look out for the next fanficiton, sequel to this one in the works...**


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